The NEW Fanfiction Quote Topic

[Atlan]

This is from a Star Wars: Knights of the old Republic fic, There's No Such Thing As Luck, by Malak's Mistress
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3628377/1/

Our mission didn’t go quite as smoothly as we wished, Master Vandar.”

“Clearly.”

“Peace, Vrook. Continue, padawan.”

“Due to my Battle Meditation, we managed to board the flagship, but Revan wasn’t on board. We found no indication as to why. We did, however, encounter Malak.”

“Yes, we know this much, padawan.”

“Malak refused to divulge the location of his Master, and attacked us. He was, ah, incapacitated when Master Quatra threw her lightsaber.”

“Was that really necessary, Quatra?”

“I didn’t mean for this to happen, if that is your qualm, Lorna.”

“What happened afterwards, Bastila? He was still conscious I assume?”

“Ah, yes. We thought it merciful to administer a sedative immediately. However, the Republic didn’t realise that we were on board the Sith vessel, and they opened fire. In the confusion and panic this created, we were unable to locate the, ah, detached appendage, and Malak, incapacitated as he was, was unable to, er, prevent his thirty foot fall to the open level below us on the ship.”

“…I see.”

“I don’t. You would have assumed Malak was dead after such a fall. Why did you retrieve his body?”

“…Well…we didn’t.”

“Explain yourself, padawan.”

“Malak managed to land on the loading ramp of our docked shuttle. The Sith flagship was breaking up around us, so we wasted no time in leaving.”

“What Bastila is trying to say is we didn’t bother rolling his body off of our ramp. We had no time to do so, we just raised it and he was lucky enough to come with.”

“Ungghh…”

“Force! Dorak! Quickly, give him something for the pain!”

“Already on it.”

“Unghuhhh…”

“Try not to talk-”

“Try not to talk?! The boy’s missing his-”

“Vash! Please, calm down. Panic is not productive.”

Get your minds out of the gutter, people!

“Zhar…I don’t know if you remember but…half of his face is missing. Remove his identifying tattoos and no one will have any idea who he is.”

[Questara]

Sailor Pluto could read the writing on the wall. Didn't mean she liked it or its message.

"The not-church of Ranma," said Genma. "He apparently had some issues with being worshipped. At one point he came up with the Five Directives, apparently inspired by some other group's Rules From On High."

"Gee, I wonder," drily said Pluto.

"It was in the year 1000 BC," said the priestess of the not-church, "or thereabouts."

"The Five Directives are," said Genma.

"1. Get Over It. The universe doesn't owe you anything. There ain't no free ride. Fix your own problems yourself, because you can't count on anyone else to do it for you.

"2. Anything Can Be Martial Arts Training. Get good enough at the martial arts and you can find uses for it everywhere.

"3. That Which Does Not Kill You Can Still Hurt. Just because the universe is a big uncaring entity doesn't mean it isn't out to get you. Avoid the problems you can, beat down the problems you can't avoid. Best if you can avoid an attack, THEN beat the snot out of your attacker.

"4. Do Not Worship Ranma. Nor shall you form cults or churches or that sort of crap. If you must do anything of that sort, make it a dojo and teach martial arts and improve your lives and that sort of thing. You especially should avoid making sacrifices and things of that nature, for Ranma may come and perform the Holy Smackdown on your head.

"5. Do Not Screw Over Others. Don't bully non-martial artists, don't take more than you need, don't go making more trouble than you really need to. Chalk it up to a life lesson learned over a whole lotta years."

"What about these?" asked Sailor Pluto.

"Oh, those are just addendums added later," said the priestess. "Like 'Watch Out For Violent Tomboys, For They Are Quick To Anger And Cause Much Property Damage' - that sort of thing."

From Phoenix Ranma

[Deric]

A bunch of great one liners are in dogbertcarroll's a boy in the hand.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3530833/1/

Chapter 1
The amazon quickly sprang on to her bike yelling something about Airen that had a group of people chasing her before she’d gotten out of the park.

Hotaru watched curiously as martial artists seemed to appear out of nowhere and join in the chase.

‘It’s times like this that I wonder if being a reborn princess from a magical kingdom is really all that strange around here.’


Chapter 2
“I caught you fair and square, so now you’re my boyfriend!” The young girl stated proudly.

Ranma nodded. It made perfect sense to him. If he could end up married by beating a girl in hand to hand combat then becoming a boyfriend by being trapped wasn’t that hard to believe. It’d certainly explain Kodachi’s claims and dating style.


The entire NWC (and in fact a good portion of Nerima) would gather in Juuban on the second Wednesday of every month for Jedite’s Big Building Material Sale.


The last time he’d played Monopoly, Ryoga had somehow gotten lost and ended up in England (They still weren’t sure how he’d managed that, he’d only rolled a three!)

after the Kamehameha incident no one dared interrupt Ranma and Kasumi’s cartoon time, even when they were watching the Care Bears. Ranma's evil grin and Kasumi’s hysterical giggles about the ‘Care Bear Stare’ caused many shivers.


Chapter 3
Ranma had some manners, you couldn't live in the same house with Kasumi Tendo and remain a complete barbarian (although Genma was trying, but even he found himself brushing grass out of his fur before coming inside) it was just that showing politeness to any of the fiancées in anything but an emergency usually caused an emergency

Ranma, being the sophisticated ladies man that he was, decided that the reason she was so red and wouldn’t let go of his hand was because the food was too spicy and since she was a bit fragile (i.e. couldn't use rebar as twist-ties)

Normally at this point, small animals would start congregating and birds would start singing, attracted by her aura of unbridled joy, unfortunately, Kasumi was having a picnic with her new friend, Belldandy on the other side of the park, so they were already booked solid. Hotaru just had to settle for the sun shining brightly down upon them and flowers blooming as they walked by.

The inquisitive reader may well wonder why, Ranma was carrying two pairs of shades. The answer to this question is simple, Ranma is not carrying two pairs of shades, Ranma is, in fact, carrying 34 pairs of sunglasses, a variety of costumes, and a very confused partridge in a pear tree.

"What do you two do together when you go out?" She asked, hoping for tips on where to take him.

"Go to parks and spar, go to carnivals and eat lots of junk foods, go to ice cream parlors and cute the servers into submission, oh and we also go to all-you-can-eat restaurants and make the owners cry."

Hotaru's eyes lit up. "So you probably turn into the exact opposite of a man amongst men!"

"So are you ready to guess?" Ranma asked nervously, sure she had figured it out.

"Yeah!"

"So what's your guess?"

"Michael Jackson!"

THUD

"Nope. He turns into a minotaur with wings and tentacles, but if you didn't know better you would swear he was a tentacled sex demon. Demon Hunters are always after him."

"Trying to kill him?"

"Not kill, no." Ranma said uncomfortably.


Unfortunately, there's only the three chapters, so far.

[Cyber_Skaarj]

Ryoga awoke in a hospital bed, his ribs taped and
his head bandaged. After a while, Doctor Tofu came
in.

"Hello, Ryoga-kun. Do you know where you are?" he
asked.

Ryoga looked at him blankly.

Classic Ryoga to be honest.

From Tales of Ranma and Ranko by By Lady Tesser and Jack Staik

[Atlan]

This is from the Watchers series, a BIG Buffy: The Vampire Slayer continuation.
http://thewatcherscouncil.net/seasontwo ... teaser.htm

Like all Vl'hurg demons, Ethrovai wore long robes. He gazed at his customer Oor and held something up for his consideration. When he spoke, his mucus-laden voice came from a mass of thick tentacles below where--in a human face--the nose would have been.

"Death," said Ethrovai enticingly, "the flaying of innocent young women, a brilliant cannibal escapes from his captors..."
"Nope" replied Oor instantly. "I already have Silence of the Lambs, the special anniversary edition."

Ethrovai nodded, returning the DVD to its place.

"Have you got The Grudge by any chance?"

"Japanese original or the remake?" Ethrovai asked.

"My kids can't speak Japanese, and they're too young to wanna read subtitles. I mean the new one starring that scary-looking blonde actress..."

"Oh! No, that's still in theaters. It'll be months before I get that." Ethrovai scanned over the other titles he had in the Children's Section. "Texas Chainsaw Massacre? An oldie but a goodie..."

"Remake?"

"We've got both. Hi Brell!" he added as another demon, this one much more anthropomorphic despite the blue skin and protruding horns, entered the store. "Be with you in a second!"

Brell waved and went to the General Releases wall. Ethrovai turned back to Oor.

"How about Alien: Resurrection? They've never seen that," Oor commented.

"You're in luck! It’s in!" With that Ethrovai grabbed the DVD for his customer, taking it to the counter. "Just one for the kids?" he asked.

The other Vl'hurg nodded and followed along. "They're already watching something now, and after they finish this," he indicated the bag of Chinese food he'd brought in, "I figure they'll only have the energy to see one more flick."

"Okay. Then, what about you and the missus?"

Oor thought about it, his tentacles pulsing a little, much as a human might have tilted their head or hummed. "Mar'arj really likes a good scary movie."

Instantly Ethrovai grabbed a DVD, one of a stack he had near the register. "This is the scariest thing to come in this year!"

The DVD cover showed a familiar pair of blonde twins, along with the title of the movie: New York Minute. Oor visibly shuddered. "I don't know...scary is one thing, but those things damn near made me soil myself last time."

"Does Mar'arj react the same way?"

"Yeah, yeah she does."

"And you'll be there to comfort her, a shoulder she can hide in. Who knows? Maybe you'll get lucky!"

"Hmmmm...she has been looking nice and bloated lately..."

[Tovath]

From Fist of the Moon
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3605736/4/Fist_of_the_Moon

Smiling, Kasumi replied “Oh my, what’s with all the formality? I don’t know how things work in Juuban, but in Nerima, if you’ve known someone for two days and they haven’t tried to marry you or attack you, then you’re the equivalent of childhood friends. Please call me Kasumi or even K-chan if it strikes your fancy.”

[Comartemis]

Here's one from Crossing Moon by Robert Haynie, wherein Ranma is the reborn Princess Serenity and reassumes Serenity's form and personality at Jusenkyo.

Usagi's first day at school proved to be interesting.

She had only attended general elementary schools and an all boys junior high (for a while in both cases) before, and so wasn't really familiar with high school ritual, but she felt fairly certain that they usually didn't start with a pack of some thirty to fifty boys in various sports outfits trying apparently to beat the living crap out of a girl while at the same time crying seemingly heartfelt protestations of love. She hadn't had a date yet-- ever-- boy or girl, but she was fairly certain that that wasn't the way it was usually gone about.

Then again, she was more interested in the somewhat familiar moves of the girl with longish black hair who was not trying to beat the living crap out of her suitors, but instead was succeeding in beating the living crap out of her suitors.

As the last of the mob fell, and the brunette stood panting, Usagi made a beeline for her, ignoring the arriving babble about teak and dying.

"Wow! I've seen multiple opponent techniques before, but that one was really good! I'm Usagi-- Usagi Saotome, I'm new at school, what's your name? Was that Anything Goes? I didn't think anyone but Pops and me did Anything Goes..."

"Truly, such a boorish-- excuse me, miss, I need to-- Pardon me, miss, but-- EXCUSE ME?"

The dark-haired girl stared at the sudden blonde face that had appeared in front of her that was saying something totally impossible. "A-Anything Goes?"

"But anyway, that was really good fighting! Although I don't see why y'were fighting, I mean, I thought I heard those guys yelling something about dating with ya if they beatcha, but that doesn't make sense, does it? So, was that some sort of demonstration, or--"

"Miss, I understand your enthusiasm for the fair Akane's skills--and indeed, I must admit to sharing them, for they are truly remarkable for a woman-- but 'tis now when I must issue my challenge for her hand, and--"

Usagi blinked. "Waitaminnit. He sayin' that all these guys WERE trying to beat you up to get a date with you?" she asked, dismissing the kendoist. "What, are you from some Amazon family or something?"

"Truly, she has the spirit of an Amazon of legend, but still, I must ask you to--"

"Did you say Anything Goes?" asked Dark-hair.

"Yup! And some of what you did looked like that, but it was mostly Kempo, and I'm really curious?"

Dark-hair blinked. A girl that could understand Kempo AND Anything Goes-- AND tell the difference-- at a glance. She HAD to get to know her.

"Well, my name's Akane Tendo. And we better hurry, or we'll be late for class."

"AW, geez! You're right, don't wanna be late on my first day!"

The two headed off to class leaving a sputtering and for once unbruised Tatewaki Kuno behind.

They got to class on time.

Kuno didn't. And he hated bucket duty.

*EDIT*
And another one.

Akane was beginning to think that trying to cheer Usagi-chan up wasn't a good idea.

Usagi was-- to be honest-- a tomboy. Well, if Akane was to be honest, so was she. But most Japanese girls wouldn't admit that to be true, where Usagi reveled in it. She was PROUD of being a tomboy.

But Usagi had been rather depressed about the test today. And, so, Akane had decided to get her friend a little present to cheer her up.

Now, Akane, tomboyish at times or not, was mostly a normal girl anyhow. Including her tastes in manga. Shojo all the way. Usagi, on the other hand, had a definite preference for shonen manga-- and would lament her lack of pocket money to collect the manga she liked.

It wasn't surprising. After all, her father had dragged her all over Japan and China in that training journey-- Usagi had only discovered manga recently, and being raised as a boy and all, would logically prefer the Shonen stuff... at least the kind about fighting.

Thus, Akane decided to get Usagi the DragonBall Z volume that she knew that the blonde hadn't been able to afford herself so far. This proved to be... a mistake.

Because the manga saleswoman wasn't-- a saleswoman.

Or, really, a woman at all.

Akane was a skilled Martial Artist-- she knew that. Not as good as Usagi, but still skilled.

At the moment, Martial Arts were oddly useless.

After all, monsters weren't bricks or perverts. And THIS was a monster. That had her by the throat.

"So much energy, so much. Oh, Master Jadeite WILL be pleased with me--"

"Let her go."

Akane, weakly, tried to see where the voice came from. Someone--someone trying to help her-- who...

"What?" the monster said, surprised.

"I said-- LET HER GO."

"And who are you to--"

"I am..." The newcomer paused, for a moment, uncertainly... and then regained her determination. "Agent of Love and Justice, I am the Pretty Sailor Suited Soldier Sailor Moon! Manga is for fun and relaxation, and your abuse of it is totally unforgivable! And in the name of the Moon--"

Here Sailor Moon struck a dynamic pose, pointing at the youma, and called--

"I ACCEPT YOUR CHALLENGE! Um. Hmmm. Maybe I should work on that bit."

[Comartemis]

Here's one from The Nighthawk Chronicles, a Buffy/Teen Titans crossover.

"Man!" Cyborg crowed as he fussed around. "This plane is sweet! Where'd you get it, and can we keep it?"

"I, uh, 'borrowed' it," Xander said. "But sure."

Cyborg turned, "You stole it?"

"Trust me, it wouldn't be a good idea to try and return it, considering who I got it from."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Slade watched the plane as it dwindled out of sight, then looked at the empty hangar on his private airstrip.

"Very impressive, Nighthawk. Very impressive indeed."

[CRBWildcat]

A personal favorite of mine, from Lathis's Dark Titans, a Ranma/Teen Titans x-over:

Ryouga's nonplussed stare descended into the dangerous territory of arctic cold. “There is a flamethrower in my umbrella.” he stated, rather matter-of-factly.

Robin's eyebrow rose noticeably at that. “There's a flamethrower in his umbrella?”

Cyborg shrugged, then nodded in agreement. “There's a flamethrower in your umbrella.”

“Why is there a flamethrower in my umbrella? The very idea of a flamethrower in my umbrella runs counter to the very nature of its existence! Where on earth did you get the idea to put a flamethrower in my umbrella?” asked the irate Lost Boy in disbelief.

Robin turned to regard the cyborg, a rather nonplussed expression of his own forming. “Yes, Cyborg. Wherever did you get the idea to put a flamethrower in his umbrella?” he asked pointedly.

Cyborg squirmed under their combined gazes. “What, you don't like the flamethrower in your umbrella?” he finally squeaked out.

The masked hero nodded first. “I don't know about Ryouga, but I know that I'm not a fan of the trick umbrella . . . let's just say there are a few bad memories . . . especially about the flamethrower in the umbrella” he muttered in a low voice.

Ryouga looked back at him oddly for a moment, before nodding as well. “Look, I'm glad you made me a new umbrella, I don't know how you did it, but it's even heavier than my old one. It's just that . .. I don't think all of these strange options work for me . . . especially the flamethrower in my umbrella . . .”

The sudden look of despair that descended on Cyborg's face was almost enough to make Robin want to perform a Shi Shi Houkodan himself. He was about to apologize to the cybernetic teen, when suddenly a wide smile broke out on Cyborg's face.

“Don't like the T-Brella, eh? I guess that means that you aren't a fan of the Helicopter option either?” drawled Cyborg.

“The Helicopter option?” repeated Ryouga, a note of interest suddenly appearing in his voice.

“The Helicopter option,” Cyborg replied, smiling smugly.

“There's a Helicopter option?”

“What? You didn't know about the Helicopter option?” drawled the techno genius, trying to sound aloof.

“No, I never made it past the flamethrower option. You mean, there's really a Helicopter option?” Ryouga asked again, still in disbelief.

“Dawg! Of course there's a Helicopter option! What kind of pimped out umbrella would it be without a Helicopter option?”

“Wow . . . maybe there's something to this Helicopter option . . .”

“Would both of you stop saying HELICOPTER OPTION!” Robin yelled. He couldn't stand it anymore, it was driving him insane! If one more person said Helicopter option, he was going to implant a birdarang straight up their a-

Cyborg and Ryouga both stared at him, a little shocked at his outburst. Then Cyborg shrugged and turned back to Ryouga.

“Dude, you have so gotta try out the Helicopter Option!”

Robin's screams were heard even by Starfire . . . and she was out at the mall of shopping . . .

[bissek]

From Anime Addventure - Switching Places/EVA

"Launch Eva," called out Misato.

Ranma let the ride take him to the Angel, but wasn't inclined to follow the script. "Okay, form Blazing Sword!"

"What?" asked Ritsuko, staring at the screen.

"No sword, huh?" asked Ranma, who knew darn well there wasn't any such thing but wanted to yank a few chains. "Okay. Ready the Wave Motion Gun!"

"Uhm, Ranma?" asked Misato.

"Rocket Punch!"

"You don't HAVE a 'Rocket Punch'," said Ritsuko, looking as if she had a headache. Which she did - named Ranma. "You don't have any weapons installed at present."

"No weapons? Maybe we should open hailing frequencies?" tried Ranma. "Maybe we should try an' get a dialogue goin' - do the whole UN thing. Settle this peacefully?"

"Why are you trying to negotiate with the Angel?" asked an incredulous Ritsuko.

"Hey, you're the ones who sent me into a fight against a giant monster and didn't put in a Blazing Sword option," pointed out Ranma. "I'm in a frickin' giant robot against some kaiju and ya go chintzy on the weapons. Yeesh."

"IT'S NOT A KAIJU!" yelled Ritsuko, surprising everyone in the command center. "Ah, I mean..."

"You say yah-maa-toe and I say yah-moh-toh, let's call the whole thing off," sing-songed Ranma.

The physical exam after the battle, vowed Ritsuko, was going to be excruciating.

From Anime Addventure - No Tendo

"You let her drain the lust off of teenage boys, that's..." Sailor Mars realized what she was saying halfway through her rant and went a lot quieter.

"Their grades are up an average of twenty percent on classes after gym as a result," said Uematsu coolly. "Possibly because they can actually concentrate on studying."

"..." Sailor Mars just looked off into the distance. On the one hand, this was allowing a yoma to feed on an unsuspecting civilian population. On the other hand, could she really object to boys being less perverted?

Sailor Jupiter looked like she had an objection, but really didn't want to speak that objection.

[Comartemis]

Another one from The Nighthawk Chronicles.

Beast Boy was about five minutes into his rant when he paused to catch his breath, an opportunity Xander seized.
"Are you quite done making a complete fool of yourself?"

Beast Boy blinked, caught off-guard, "Huh?"

Scowling, Terra walked up to Beast Boy and smacked him upside the head, then grabbed him by his shirt and pulled him into a deep kiss.

"But... but..." Beast Boy stammered when she finally let him go.

"He's my friend, Beast Boy," she snapped. "Of course I was worried about him. Robin made him second in command. Of course I listened to him."

"After what he did?!"

"That's sweet, BB," she said, stroking his face. "It really is. But I don't need you to be a knight in shining armor and defend my honor. Really."

"There is something vaguely weird about this..." Xander muttered, shaking his head.

"Are you calling her weird?"

Terra smacked him again, "Are you trying to be dense? Knowing him, he's probably been in your shoes more than once."

Xander blinked, "Are you telepathic, too, Terra?"

"And if I was?" she shot back.

"Hmm," Xander mused. After a long moment spent picturing something involving him, Terra, a distinct lack of clothing, and a large quantity of whipped cream, he said, "Well, you haven't smacked me yet, so I guess you're not."

She smacked him.

[ssokolow]

All the potentially notable quotes I run across are available through the randomizer at http://www.ficfan.org/ and the full collection is available on request as a BasKet Note Pads backup bundle, an HTML export of said basket, or a data file for the UNIX fortune command. (which is what the randomizer on the site takes as input)

Sorry I can't look through and share the cream of the crop, (I'd love to) but I've already procrastinated my assignments far too long.

[Questara]

"You know, I never thought in a million years that I'd be more scared of facing one little redheaded girl than a squad of forty foot giants," Rick said, "but I have to admit, that's one scary woman."

"Yeah," Roy agreed. "But she's got a heart of gold."

"And a fist of depleted Uranium," Rick snorted.

"On no," Roy disagreed. "It's much harder than that."

From Chapter 22 of Dragon Lady Of Macross By Calamity-Queen of Cordite (Formerly Lisa Grey)

[Comartemis]

Here's a rather disturbing possibility brought to you by Metroanime's Hotaru 1/2.

Shampoo tried to come to terms with the events recently.

Okay, maybe great-grandmother and Cat-goddess-person were right and she *had* screwed things up royally as far as wooing her airen.

How could she act less than true to herself though? Well, apparently she had to. In order to get Ranma in this mess, she had to change tactics completely.

When it had been practically rubbed in her face, Shampoo could acknowledge that just maybe her ideas of what would win Ranma over were based more on the boys of her village than a boy of Japan.

Shampoo stopped the bike she was doing early morning deliveries on and looked at her reflection in the mirrored glass of an office building. From what she understood of men, they should be all over her. She was cute, she had a good figure, she dressed to emphasize that figure, and she was naturally very affectionate and enthusiastic. Perky and cute worked on the majority of TV programs she'd seen, but weren't working here.

So what was it that her airen saw in Akane anyway? Maybe he was one of those guys who actually enjoyed getting hurt? Shampoo made a face after contemplating that thought. It made *way* too much sense. After all, who would he have learned affection from - his father?

Her eyes widened. That theory now made *way* too much sense. Insults and violence as a means of expressing affection. Her airen was seriously messed up!

Still, she'd apparently been going around with a theory that had proven incorrect before - so she ought to bounce this idea off someone else before embracing it. Shampoo made her delivery, accepted the payment, and turned her bike to a different path. There were others losing in this match, and if they were to ally at least temporarily - it would make their own hand the stronger.

-------

Ukyo listened to the Amazon as she explained her theory. So did a number of her early morning customers.

"You know, the scary thing is," said a sarariman with a breakfast okonomiyaki, "that fits."

Ukyo had been about to scoff this lame idea, but now she thought about it again. Could that be it? The reason that Akane and Ranma had continued to get closer was because to Ranma's delusional Genma-defined system - unreasoning anger + insults + violence = affection? That he and Akane had been getting closer was not despite the violence - but because of it?

Another sarariman spoke up. "You know, Akane's always had that temper. Could be that she enjoys pounding Ranma and so she's subtly encouraging him. Can you imagine what kind of spiral that would lead to eventually?"

Ukyo shuddered, picturing a laughing Akane having thrust a sword through Ranma's heart.

Shampoo shuddered, picturing a smiling Akane having chopped off Ranma's manhood as an ingredient in some stew.

"Of course, if you're right, that new girl is going to be rejected. She just doesn't seem that violent." The first sarariman put in. "He'll end up going back to Akane."

Ukyo and Shampoo shuddered, met each other's gazes and nodded. Better Ranma ended up with scary powerful Sailor Senshi than in a bloody pool in the dojo!

[bissek]

From Anime Addventure - No Tendo:

Area 51 had seen some really strange machinery in its time. Advanced craft created by the American military had flown from there for decades, and lately it had seen alien fighter units, space technology, and new sorts of locomotion. Those there were used to researching devices of unusual and powerful origins.

They just weren't so used to seeing what was going on with the latest adaptation of advanced technologies. Using the new battery technology and artificial myomer structures, the MADDOX power armor was being field tested at Area 51. It was a very clear and powerful leap forward in military hardware that would likely give the Goa'uld a run for their money.

Of course, the fact that it was only a test, and not an actual combat situation made what the current test pilot was doing less embarrassing.

"Form Blazing Sword!" called out Harry Maybourne as he had the unit stand dramatically.

"Sir?" commented one of the development team, sounding as apologetic as he could. "That unit has a chain gun, no sword. There is a knife though."

"What? No sword?! Have to add one for the Mk II then. Knives are for villains and wimpy little mecha pilots who hide behind their mommies. America deserves giant robots with whopping big swords!"

"Understood, sir," the technician replied, mentally sighing to himself about the oddities of military officers.