Saturn Baby

[J. St.C. Patrick]

This is a story I've been working on for the past seven years. And it is not finished yet.

Without further ado, I present:

Saturn Baby

A Tale From The S Files


Ranma 1/2 and its characters and settings belong to Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Kitty, and Viz Video.
Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon belongs to Takeuchi Naoko, Koudansha, TV Asahi, and Toei Douga, and DIC.
Santa Claus is Comin' to Town is a Rankin/Bass Production written by Romeo Muller. Produced by Arthur Rankin Jr. and Jules Bass, animated by Tadahito Mochinaga

This is a spamfic, of that there can be no doubt. Characters are out of character. Fanon content abounds, astounds and confounds! Plug and Play. Lock and Load. Duck and Cover. Run and Hide!

You have been warned.




Mistress Nine and Pharaoh 90 had been defeated. All should have been right with the world as Sailor Moon in her guise of Neo Queen Serenity reset the world and all those caught in the destruction of Mugen Gakuen were reborn. But in the euphoria of rebirth it was noticed that Sailor Saturn was gone.

Hotaru was gone!

One moment the reformed baby Hotaru Tomoe was in Sailor Moon's arms the next she was whisked out of Moon's hands and through a dimensional tear to another world.

A world of black and white...

Where it was cold.

Oh, so very cold...

It had been snowing. Again. Snow covered the black slate tiles of the rooftops of the remote forest town of Kunoburg. It was gathered in drifts against the grey stone walls and dusted the grey shutters. Even the evergreens were colorless, their branches were covered in snow and only their dark trunks were visible. The only colour to be found outdoors was on the spires of the mayoral palace which were topped with golden pineapples. These too were iced with snow.

Kunoburg was not a very happy place. How could it be when it was run by a man who, as the Kunoburghers said (privately), was more than a few cubes short of an ice tray?

Some said he had gone snow crazy. Others said it must be because his underwear was too tight. Still others said it was the fault of his aunt who had given him the same fruit cake for Christmas 47 years in a row. (Though they also faulted him for giving it back to her at each following Easter)

Whatever the cause, the cake or the shorts or the snow, the madness of Kunomeister Meisterkuno showed itself in various ways. First were his regulations. Most of which changed daily. The only one that didn't was Rule No.1 - where he insisted that everyone have their hair cut to his regulation. Close cropped for boys and pageboy for girls. It should be noted that the Kunoburghers tended to be observe the law only in the breach, save for the unlucky few the mayor personally managed to catch.

Then there was his obsession with pineapples. The populace of Kunoburg had never seen a pineapple, save for the decorations on the spires and on the uniforms and helmets of the city guard. The fabulous fruit came, it was said, from the fabled land of Hawaii – a land that knew no snow. And more than that, it had color; not just hues of black, white and grey. A veritable Technicolor heaven. It was, they agreed in Kunoburg, a myth.

Something they wished was a myth were his shirts, which he wore over his lederhosen. While there was very little color in the wider world of Kunoburg, the Kunomeister’s shirts made up for the lack. The shirts were covered in what he called palm trees, something called a beach, and the ever ubiquitous pineapples. They were bright enough that it was said that he always wore sunglasses to protect himself from the reflected glare.
Consequently this was the reason given for his forbidding other people from wearing bright colors.

The mayor's right hand man was one Grimsuke. He was proud of his position with the Kunomeister and was never seen without his highly polished jackboots and high collared grey uniform or even without his silver helmet, topped by a gold pineapple, which he was rumored to wear both to bed and in the shower. He was also a fairly pleasant fellow who did his best to mitigate the whims of his master, though not very successfully.

Grimsuke had just been about to make his first rounds of the day when he heard a bump at the door. He thought it was odd that main door should go 'bump' at this hour in the morning. Though he felt it might be better than something that went ‘bump’ in the night. He went to the massive wooden door and, braving the blast of cold air, opened it and found a small bundle at his feet. Picking the bundle up, he went straight to his master.

"Herr Kunomeister! Herr Kunomeister!" He called as he entered the dining room where Kunomeister Meisterkuno was eating his breakfast.

"Look, sir, look what I discovered on your front stoop."

"What, Grimsuke?" said the Kunomeister, "Da milk? Da daily paper?"

"No, sir, a baby," replied Grimsuke in a matter of fact tone.

"Oh, is dat all?" Meisterkuno waved dismissively, then Grimsby's words registered.

Choking back a mouthful of pineapple shaped pancake, he exclaimed, "A *baby*!?"

"I presume, sir, that some misguided soul, with noble intention, left it at your door so that you might bring it up with all the care and attention it deserves." Grimsuke speculated.

"I, Kunomeister Meisterkuno, The Big Kahuna of Kunoburg take care of a baby? Bad enough I have to take care of my son, who defies me with his unshorn locks!" Spluttered Meisterkuno. Shouting, he continued, "Outrageous! Wha's its name?"

"This is the only clue," Grimsuke answered, holding up a tag on the bundle the baby was wrapped in. "It says, 'Saturn', sir."

"Ah, take da little bas.., er, baggage to da orphaned keiki asylum," the Kunomeister commanded, " Dat's da proper place for foundlings anyway."

The baby who had been cooing in Grimsuke's gentle embrace began to cry at the Kunomeister’s harsh tone.

The Kunomeister stood and with a deliberate flourish pointed at the door shouting,
"Get that keiki out of here! And get it a hair cut while you're out!" With that he returned to his breakfast.

Grimsuke, hurrying to follow his master's command, placed the baby on a sled and set off from the Kunomeistorial palace in the direction of the Kunoburg Kunomemorial Orphan Asylum at the edge of town by the foot of the mountain of the whispering winds. The mountain where the green haired Solstice Sorceress was said to practice dark and mysterious arts.

The wind suddenly whipped up as the blizzard made its second attempt on the town. Grimsuke, trudging through the snow, paused for a moment to adjust his collar to keep out the cold. He loosened his grip on the sled and its wee bundle for just a moment. A moment was all that was needed, for the wind caught the sled and baby and carried it up and away into the forest on the mountains of the whispering wind.

Grimsuke ran after the flying sled but soon lost sight of it as it cleared the tops of the trees. “Come back, Baby Saturn! Come Back!!”

Miraculously the sled and baby Saturn landed safely on a path on the other side of the mountain. The path was sloped and soon the sled was tobogganing downhill at great speed towards a little house. Plowing through several snow banks on either side of the pathway the sled slowed down and came to a gentle stop as it bumped the door of the cottage.

"Who's there?" came a voice from inside the cottage.
The door opened and a small brunette elf looked out.
"There's … who?" She exclaimed as she saw the bundle.

"Well, wiggle my ears and tickle my toes, I think I see a baby's nose. And there's more than a nose there's a whole baby attached. Oh my, it looks like my old sempai..." The elf looked closer at the dark haired child, "except this is a girl."

"I'd better call my sisters.' Jingle Kringle thought. "Mingle! Vingle! Mangle!!"

Three heads looked out of the door, "What is it Vingle?" they chorused.

"Someone's brought us a baby!"

"A baby?" inquired Mingle the blue haired.

"My vision came true!" exclaimed Mangle happily.

"She's as pretty as a peanut!" bubbled the blonde Vingle.

"I like babies," added Jingle.

"Our baby is the best baby of them all" Vingle burbled happily.

"We should take our baby inside out of the cold and show her to our Queen." Mingle wisely suggested.

And so into the twee cottage the elf troop went.

The Queen of the Kringle elves was one Tsukingle Kringle, affectionately known as Bunny (though Mangle sometimes called her Bungle, but never in a mean way, except when Bunny took her comic books or ate all the cookies. Which, actually, happened quite a bit.

"Oh, Wow! A baby! We shall look after her and bring her up. And she shall drink hot cocoa with us and eat cookies with us and cake and ice cream.... mmmm… ice cream! But what shall we call her?" effused the blonde twin ponytailed queen of the elves.

"Her tag says 'Saturn'" Mingle informed her queen.

"Hmmm... That's no good. We must call her something else." Bunny declared as she began to pace back and forth, her long ponytails swinging around every time she turned.

“Rosebud” said Mingle brightly, only to have the queen glare at her.

“Hot Chocolate!” suggested Vingle, only to have the other elves glare at her

The queen continued to pace forth. And back. And forth.

"Ah Ha!" She said brightly, stopping suddenly as she turned causing her long blonde tresses to wrap around her legs as she came to a decision, "We shall call her Krystal, and she shall be our Krystal. Krystal Kringle she is!"

o00oo00o

"It's almost like our baby grew up overnight" said Bunny brightly as she watched the toddler running around the cottage.

"It was overnight, we only found her yesterday" objected the raven haired Mangle.

"I said 'almost'. You're a meanie Mangle" whined Tsukingle.

"At her growth rate," commented Mingle, "we should plan for educating her in the ways of toy making soon."

“At her growth rate” observed Vingle, “She’ll be too big for the cottage!!”

“Wah! She’s a monster!” wailed Tsukingle as she threw up her hands and ran around the room.

Krystal stood for a moment and watched, then copied the elf queen.

o00oo00o

Over the next few months she passed through several stages of childhood from toddler through preschooler to early school age.

Young Krystal, now apparently 7 years old, sat attentively watching as Queen Tsukingle demonstrated the proper way to stuff a teddy bear.

"You hold the bear in one hand, take the stuffing in the other and push it into the hole in the back of the bear. Any questions? Yes Krystal?"

"Is its head supposed to fall off like that?"

"Wah!"


0-0

"Now I shall demonstrate the proper procedure for creating princess dolls. You take out your magic wand point it at the doll and say the words "Kringle Princess Make Up!" And ‘Voila’ you have a princess doll!
And for the Prince doll you say, "Kringle Tuxedo Suit Up! And ‘Voila’ you have your own prince!
...

Vingle! Jingle! Stop drooling over the Prince dolls!"

"But they're so delicious!"

"Stop eating them too! They’re not Gingerbread. . . . mmm Gingerbread…”



0.0

Another Month had passed and Krystal had grown again. She was absorbing all the lessons that the Kringle elves could teach her, reading, writing, math, geography and toy making. She was now as tall as the elves.

After each toy making lesson the finished toys were taken to a large barn out behind the cottage and dumped in an appropriate pile. This caused the now apparently 10 year old Krystal to ask the question, "Why are we making toys if we are simply storing them?"

Queen Tsukingle drew herself up to her full height and explained " We Kringle elves have a Royal Warrant to make toys given to me by King Endymion himself" (little hearts appeared in her eyes as she mentioned the king's name). Then she began to sing. Or rather she was about to sing when she was hit by a well timed rubber ball dropped by Mangle.

"Sorry about that, Chief!"

"Mangle, You meanie!" pouted the disheveled queen, who then took off after Mangle.

"Anyway," continued Mingle over the sounds of Bunny bashing Mangle with various toys, "We make the toys because the King drew up a contract with us. We don't deliver the toys because we live in this out of the way valley and can't get over the mountain of the whispering winds due to the presence of the Solstice Sorceress, who won't let us cross ' until the time is right'." She shuddered as she said the Sorceress' name and then ducked as a Jack-in-the-Box flew over her head.

Stopping in the midst of her Mangle mangling, Bunny straightened up and added, "It is my dream that one day we shall have our toy factory in town and children all over will play with our toys"

Krystal piped up "When I'm big enough I will deliver the toys!"

"You will?!! Oh Goodie! Goodie! Goodie!" clapped Bunny as she forgot about Mangle for the moment and bounced over to Krystal. "We'll get the toys in a bundle and load them on to a sled so you can take them over the mountain. Yippee!"

o00oo00o

Eight months after she was found on the Kringle Kottage doorstep it appeared that Krystal's amazing growth had slowed and she now appeared to be a young woman about 16 years old. They decided that the time was right for Krystal to take the toys across the mountain of the whispering winds. The elves filled a large bag with toys and loaded it onto a sled, which would be pulled by their donkey, Nestor.

On the night before Krystal was to leave, the Elves, giggling to themselves, called her into the cottage's main room.

"Krystal, you are about to embark on a great journey," began Queen Tsukingle, "And as a member of our family it is time for us to give you these presents. Mingle."

Mingle stepped forward and gave Krystal a present, “This is your own Kringle magic wand, with it you can summon..."

Jingle stepped forward, and handed Krystal a bag and picked up where Mingle left off, " Your own Kringle elf outfit."

"Ooh" gushed Krystal as she examined the short red skirt, leotard, gloves and tall lace up boots. "It's Lovely! but won't I get cold on the sled?"

"Yes" interjected Mangle, "which is why I have an official Kringle thermal blanket for you on the journey" and with that she handed her a bundled red blanket with white trim.

“Oooh, Thank you! Thank you very..."

'Wait," shouted Vingle, "you don't have my gift yet, your own Kringle hat" With a flourish she placed the hat on Krystal's head, where it settled over the raven haired girl’s eyes.

o00oo00o

In Kunoburg a busty redheaded girl was cursing a certain green tressed sorceress, as she did every time she was splashed with cold water.

"mutter mutter, . . . just because I called her a no-talent, flat chested, two bit magician's side kick who wouldn't know how to pull a rabbit out of a hat, she does this to me... mutter, mutter..."

Ranma had been a brash young man on a martial arts training trip when he and the fellow he was training with found themselves on the mountain of the whispering wind.

The sorceress appeared out of nowhere and told them to leave her mountain. He, of course, wondered aloud what could a no-talent, flat-chested sorry excuse for a two bit magician's sidekick do to two such talented martial artists. His friend, standing legs apart and arms akimbo nodded in agreement.

Well, she showed them.

Now every time he was splashed with cold water he became a busty redhead. And not just any busty redhead, no, he became a busty redhead in a sequined blue-black tuxedo-leotard and coat with top hat, black mesh stockings and high heels. And in this enchanting garb she had unfortunately been espied by the scion of the Kunomeister clan, a would-be dashing gallant, who declared her to be his magical sparkly goddess and pursued her doggedly despite her protestations of disgust.

If there was an upside to Ranma’s enchantment then at least when splashed with hot water he turned back to his male self, though he would find himself in a male magician's costume of top hat, white bow tie and shirt, black coat with tails and black trousers and shiny black shoes. Finding hot water in frozen Kunoburg, however - now there was a trick. But, even with that complication, and although he wouldn't say it too loudly, he felt he got the better part of the curse.

His friend, Ryoga, became a penguin. Sadly Ryoga already suffered from a family curse. No one in his family had a sense of direction. Now they were stuck in Kunoburg. At least Ranma was. He had no idea where Ryoga had gone. The last he saw of him someone was trying to ship him to Antarctica. And she had been unable to help as young Kuno had been chasing her at the time.

Unless he could somehow placate the sorceress they would not be free of their curses.

o00oo00o


Meanwhile in the forest on the mountain of the whispering wind young Krystal Kringle was trying valiantly to make her way over to Kunoburg. She hadn't quite realized just how many toys the Kringle elves had made during the last dozen years or more. Behind her a trail of toys marked her passage as she kept trying to lighten the load. She really wished she had at least a dog to help her pull the sled.

While a Husky or Malamute would be preferred, she'd even accept a small dog of indeterminate breed named Max. She would say "Mush, Max!" and Max would pull the sled forward. Then, when they reached the top of the hill, she would let Max join her on the sled and they would ride down hill blowing trumpets all the way.

At the moment, however, she had neither a Malamute, nor a Husky, or a dog named Max.
Nor did she even have a donkey named Nestor. He had refused to leave the stable. Not for the first time that day she wondered what possessed her set out on her own, when she could be home having cookies and hot cocoa. Mmmm… hot cocoa.

She put one foot in front of the other and slowly made her way across the floor of the forest. Which is where her reverie was shattered, as a penguin waddled into her, knocking the pair of them to the ground. As she blinked at the misplaced bird she wondered where it got the yellow bandana with black pixel dots and why it had a fifty kunomark stamp stuck to its breast.

"Where are you going in such a hurry?" Krystal asked the bird, not really expecting an answer.

She was somewhat surprised when the bird sat up, gave a "Hwonk", and then with its feet wrote in the snow:
"This is Ranma's Fault!"

"That doesn't answer my question" said the short skirt-clad girl. "However, it is probably not safe for you to be here on your own. Would you like to join me on my trip to town to deliver these toys?" she added with visions of the penguin pulling the sled.

"Hwonk" the penguin nodded and hopped up on the sled.

"So much for that idea," she thought as she wearily picked up the rope attached to the sled and started pulling again.

Oo0oO

A tall green tressed figure was looking at a long trail of abandoned toys that dotted her mountain. “Those Kringle elves are at it again! I do wish they would clean up after themselves! Well. I’ve warned them, now I will punish the offender.”

0oo0oo0

The day was cold and bright as the Kunomeister stepped out of the Kunomeistorial palace to make his day inspection of the town and the populace’s haircuts. Before him was his town. Men and women dressed in blacks and greys hurrying to and fro while children played games in the square.

Halfway down the steps his view of the world took on a whole different perspective as he suddenly found himself at the bottom of the stairs looking up at the sky and had small pineapples circling his head. Righting himself and attempting to stand he found he not only had a bump on his noggin but had sprained his ankle as well.

“GRIMSUKE!”

“Yes, Herr Kunomeister,” came the meek reply.

“Explain how I, Kunomeister Meisterkuno came to be looking up at the sky with a bump on my po’o and a pain on my wawae.”

“You trod on this toy.” Grimsuke revealed, holding up a red and blue ball with as much distain as he could muster.

“As I suspected: a conspiracy! I hate toys! And toys hate me! Deese Keiki playthings have been plotting against me an’ dis is da proof. Either they are going or I am going and I definitely am not going!”

“Hey, Meister, can I have my ball back?” came a young voice.

“NO!” roared the Kunomeister. “I am confiscating it and all other toys in Kunoburg. Effective immediately they will be brought here and burned!”

“But why, sir, why?” came the youngster’s plaintive cry.

“Because, my dear keiki, it doesn’t have a pineapple on it and you don’t have the right haircut” Grinned the Kunomeister, brandishing his shears. In a blink the bewildered child was sporting a buzz cut and the square was empty of pedestrians.

“Grimsuke, what are you standing about for man? You’ve got your orders, Move! ”

“Right away, Herr Kunomeister!” with that Grimsuke motioned to the guards who began to pick up every toy in the town and then piled them in front of the Kunomeistorial palace, leaving confused parents and crying children in their wake.

To emphasize the point posters were pasted on walls all over town:

Toys are hereby declared
illegal, immoral, unlawful
AND anyone found with a
toy in his possession will
be placed under arrest and
thrown in the dungeon.
No kidding!

Issued by the Authority of
His Honour Kunomeister MeisterKuno

ps Hair will be cut!!!


And so all the toys in Kunoburg awaited a fiery fate.

00oo00

All? Well, not quite. Better to say that almost all the toys had been confiscated. The few that were not had not been taken by guards who were not talking about the bumps and bruises they were sporting which had been given out by what appeared to be a two bit magician’s busty redheaded assistant.

“Idiots, ” she said, “ almost made me crack a nail.”

0.0;

“GAH! I gotta get some hot water quick!”


‘Damn them anyway. It’s a martial artist’s duty to protect the weak and innocent. Taking toys from children!’

She looked everywhere, high and low and couldn’t see any freely available source of hot water. Ahead she could see a few vendors braving the cold weather. Hot food - check. Cold beer – check. Container in which she might melt snow over fire used to heat food – zip.

“Why doesn’t this town have any hot water!” the busty redhead queried the world at large as she snacked on some hot porkbuns. ‘At least this girl body comes in handy for getting free snacks.’


000oo000


Krystal, after some hard slogging pulling the sled, the toys and P-Chan (as she was now affectionately calling the penguin, stood at top a rise from which she could see Kunoburg. It was all downhill from here. But it looked such a dismal place all black, grey and white.


Suddenly a voice boomed behind her:

“For messing up my mountain I will punish you. Toys are for playing with not littering!”

Krystal was so startled she jumped ten feet in the air and landed on the sled, sending it over the crest and it began a careening run down the hill along the forest path towards the gates of the town.

“Rats!” said the Solstice Sorceress, “You’ll have to clean up the toys. I’ll deal with the Kringle when she comes back.” With that she spun her staff and vanished.

“Squeek” saluted the rats as they scurried to pick up the carelessly strewn playthings.

OO00OO

Just outside the gates of Kunoburg two of the finest guards stood there waiting to check all who entered and exited for contraband toys and hair care products.

“It’s quiet today” said the first guard.

“Yes,” replied the other, stamping his feet in the snow to keep warm. “Quiet, but still ...”

“Still what?”

“Still quiet.”

The words were no sooner out of his mouth when he and his compatriot were bowled over by a fast moving blur that disappeared through the open gateway and into the heart of town.

From a newly created snow bank came the voice of the first guard, “Did anyone get the number of that sled?”

oo00oo

The sled and its two occupants caromed through the streets, the rails of the sled sending up occasional streamers of sparks as they hit bare cobblestones. Finally the sled, the girl, the bird and the toys all came to stop as they ran out of steam just in front of a fountain in the city square.

“Wow!” Said Krystal, “that was fun!”

“Wark!” P-chan opined waving his wings in what Krystal took for agreement.

The pair then had the feeling that they were being watched. They turned to see that two children in grey clothes were looking at them with their mouths agape.

“You can gets arrested for that you know” said the boy.
“Arrested” nodded the girl in agreement.

“For tumbling in to the edge of a fountain?”

“Nah,” said the boy off handedly.
“Uh Uh” said the girl, shaking her head.

“For traveling at an unsafe speed on a sled?”

“Nope” the boy waved her off

“No way.” the girl added

“Having an un-licensed penquin?”

“Nope” the boy shook his head

“Well, why then?”

“For wearin’ the funny red clothes.” he said pointedly.
“For sure.” she assured.

“Oh” Krystal replied with a bit of confusion entering her voice.

“Color is outlawed!” said the boy conspiratorially
“immoral and fattening” added the girl in hushed tones.

“Hwonk! Hwonk!”

She turned to the Penguin, “No, P-Chan, It’s not Ranma’s fault this time.”

“You understood what he said?“ exclaimed the boy, wide eyed.
“What he said?” echoed the girl.

“No, but he blames this Ranma person for everything. He’s obsessed.”

“Demon!” cried the boy
“For sure” seconded the girl, making the sign to ward off the evil eye.

“No, no, no, I said obsessed, not possessed.” placated Krystal, waving her arms wildly.

“Oh?”
“O?”

“How about I give you each a toy and we forget this whole thing?”

“Okay” said the girl.
“Deal!” said the boy, diving into the sack of toys.

Toys in hand, the young pair wandered off.
“She’s going to get arrested for sure.” opined the boy as they turned the corner.
“For sure!”

000ooo000

Word of the red clad stranger handing out toys quickly spread and soon Krystal and P-chan were surrounded by clamoring children, all of whom wanted a toy.

Within minutes the square was full of happy children playing with toys and a very dazed Krystal and penguin. And as she was recovering and rolling up her empty sack, a shadow fell across her and P-chan.

“Allo, allo, allo, what’s all this then, eh?” spoke a stout captain of the guard whose upper lip was expertly fortified by a redoubtable moustache. “Well, well, well, my little lady, it looks like you are in a heap o’ trouble. Nefariously corrupting the young. Handing out playthings o’ mass distraction. No. No. No. This will never do. Corporal, take her in to custody!”

And so the Corporal would have done had he not been sent sprawling into unconsciousness by what appeared to Krystal to be a not so flat chested, two bit magician's side kick in a sequined blue-black tuxedo-leotard with top hat, black mesh stockings and high heels.

And a moment later a fairly surprised Captain Moustache joined the Corporal in la la land.

But not before his thermos of hot coffee broke open spraying Krystal’s savior, transforming her into him – a dashing young hero in top hat, white tie and tails.

“My Prince!” the raven haired Krystal exclaimed, while launching herself to glomp a thoroughly bewildered Ranma. Who could only utter “eep!”.

OOOxxxOOO

The penguin, to say the least, was not amused.

XXXoooXXX


My thanks to Sunshine and gsteemso for having looked at the story in it's various forms over the years.

End Part One

[Sunshine Temple]

Nice!

Glad to see more of this. And seeing Krystal's progression is amusing, and works well. Especially enjoyed the bit at the end with her finding her "prince".

[DCG]

Woah. Im kinda dizzy after reading all that. Lots fun tho.

[LawOhki]

Woah. Im kinda dizzy after reading all that. Lots fun tho.

Agreed, a lot to take in and a good deal of guess work on character appearances/settings. Immediately jumped to that old Rankin/Bass special but it's been like 15 years since I've seen it so only very basic recollection remains.

[Dumbledork]

Definitely something else., though a lot of fun.

[talonhunter]

Laughing so hard right now I pulked a muscle...I can't wait to see more of this little jewel

[gsteemso]

Thoroughly excellent, as always. I can’t imagine where this is going, but I really want to read it getting there!

[J. St.C. Patrick]

Thanks for the comments everyone.

I apologize in advance that it may be a while before the next part gets posted.

Hopefully not the seven years that the first part took.