Temple of Ranma's Sailor Senshi Seifuku

by **Nekomata-sensei** » Tue Jul 11, 2006 6:46 am

Okay, this is an idea for a Naruto fanfic. I've noticed that a lot of people go with the whole gig of Naruto being the son of the Yondaime, because of the whole blonde hair, blue eyes thing, oftentimes making up some advanced bloodline belonging to the 4th or Naruto's mother in the process.
But there is another family in cannon with a member with blonde hair and blue eyes. The Yamanaka clan.
Although it is unclear of the skill of the valentine possession technique is related to an advanced bloodline or not, in this fic, it would be, as I've seen in some others, a sort of psychic power bloodline.
A child of the Yamanaka clan was chosen to seal the Kyuubi because the Yamanaka have natural defenses against possession, even untrained they create mindscapes which someone attempting to possess them must navigage, and through meditation, they can change their mindscape and improve their mental defenses, and without training, even if their mindscape is navigated, they have great ability to resist possession and other mental effects, including genjutsu.
In this fic, Naruto is actually Ino's twin brother, only they don't know it of course, since Naruto was disowned soon after the Yondaime died and the 3rd refused to have Naruto killed, which the Yamanaka's had been planning on when they gave up their son.
Part of Naruto's fighting ability when channeling Kyuubi's chakra is from subconciously using his bloodline to pick up fighting instincts from the Kyuubi, rather than being affected by the youki in any way. The mindscape Naruto enters to meet the Kyuubi in cannon only exists in this fic because of Naruto inheriting the Yamanaka bloodline.
Part of the problem of accepting Naruto into their clan is he can't use the art of the valentine or he'd be possessed by the Kyuubi who would then escape, killing Naruto in the process.
The thing that instigates this all being noticed, and the place of divergence from cannon, is the first test of the chuunin exams, when Sakura is possessed by Ino to steal the answers. Inner Sakura rears her giant forehead early, rather than in the prelims, and because she was possessed by Ino, realizes the purpose of the test, she also has realized Naruto can't answer the questions, and demands Ino also possess Naruto and give him the answers as well, just like she is going to do for her own teammates.
Ino agrees, intimidated and freaked out by the agressive split personality Sakura possesses and feeling slightly sorry for Naruto. After giving the answers to her team-mates, she tries to possess Naruto... but instead ends up in his mindscape!
Ino is shocked since only someone really well trained in meditation and intelligent, (such as Shikamaru) or a member of the Yamanaka clan, can create a mindscape, and by the looks of Naruto's sewerified mind realizes Naruto must be related to her and possess the Yamanaka bloodline. Naruto is shocked to be pulled into his mindscape by Ino's presence and freaks out for a bit. Ino explains the situation, and that he seems to possess the Yamanaka psychic bloodline, and helps him answer the test questions. Then Ino notices a 'weird glow' coming from down the hall, and insists they investigate. They both discover the Kyuubi's cage, which terrifies Ino and Naruto is forced to explain about the Kyuubi vessel, and how he discovered this from being told by the traitor Mizuki.
Ino quickly deduces that Naruto must have been disowned, because if he were to be in the clan, it would give them a bad reputation, since he was a demon vessel and he couldn't use art of the valentine, which was the basic skill of the Yamanaka clan which later jutsu's built upon and was the primary method of training for Yamanaka clan members. She has seen how badly treated Naruto is, and is rather independent from her parents and doesn't like them much, and asserts that she thinks this is wrong and acknoledges Naruto as her brother, which makes Naruto really happy.
Ino pulls out of Naruto's mind for the final question, and things continue from there as normal, except Ino explains to her team during the 2nd exam that she'd discovered about the Kyuubi and Naruto being her brother, Shikamaru isn't surprised, saying he'd allready figured it out since they look sort of alike, have the same birthday, which is on the day the Kyuubi was defeated, and the way the adults treat Naruto, and Choji just accepts it. They rush quicker to team 7's rescue against the sound nins, although it doesn't make much of a difference besides Sakura not getting as injured and Ino noticing the seal that was placed on Naruto, who hadn't noticed it himself, when she insists on checking him over for injuries before she leaves.
Because of this, Naruto gets the 5 part seal removed by the 3rd before the preliminaries, and fares a bit better against Kiba. Also, Naruto doesn't cheer Sakura in the prelims, but because she was able to before, Inner Sakura manifests anyway, and surprises Ino by being able to beat her mentally, as Ino thought she'd be able to overpower Inner Sakura.
Things would continue differently for Naruto's training. Ino will have allready convinced her team to have Naruto train with them, and she sneaks into her family scroll stash (which is protected by a special seal so that only members of the yamanaka-clan with their advanced bloodline can open it or read the scrolls) looking for techniques Naruto can use that won't leave him vulnerable to possession.
Asuma gets Kakashi's notes about how terrible Naruto's chakra control is and teaches him the water walking excersize (and notes that Kakashi was either lying through his teeth to get an excuse to train only Sasuke, or Naruto learns incredibly fast in the right circumstances), he also discovers by having Naruto spar with his team that Naruto's taijutsu almost completely lacks form and he has very little sparring experience, and his fighting style is basically street fighting with shadow clones, so he has Naruto train in taijutsu, pointing out that it would make his use of shadow clones more effective.
Ino discovers, much to her shock, that Naruto can't even read properly, not being able to read most things with kanji, and that's one of the main reasons he struggled so badly in the academy, because he was never taught basic things like how to read. Luckily, one of the new techniques she finds on the scrolls allows her to give Naruto some of her knowledge, which she'd sorted and categorized allready for her own purposes, and gives him most of the basic knowledge of Academy ninja teachings, as well as how to read and write properly.
Ino also trains Naruto to use his advanced bloodline. She teaches him the meditations to organize maintain, and clean up his mindscape, which helps Naruto improve his concentration and use more of his inteligence. This indirectly teaches Naruto to call upon the Kyuubi's chakra, by recalling the triggers from the battle against Orochimaru and the battle of the bridge. Ino and Naruto are able to learn some Yamanaka clan techniuqes that are non-cannon, a limited mind reading technique that can work like what people often _think_ the sharingan does, which can operate with simple concentration and no hand seals, but needs you to 'tag' your opponent's mind with spiritual energy by flaring your spiritual aura, a more intrusive mind reading technique requiring hand seals and physical contact which is used instead of interrogating prisoners in some important cases, and an advanced version of the art of the valentine which doesn't need you to leave your own body, but has the disadvantage of not getting your opponent's senses, just being able to control their body, and being forced to split your concentration between controlling your own body and controlling theirs. They also learn telekinetic skills, a jutsu that creates a telekinetic force feild perfect defense (gaseous attacks and particle attacks tend to penetrate it, as can particularly slow attacks, or attacks that are entirely non-physical) although it uses up spiritual energy at a high rate whenever it takes a hit to maintain itself, and basic telekinetic skills of bending spoons and throwing and controlling the movements of small objects such as Kunai or suriken, without touching them. Finally, they learn anti genjutsu techniques that makes them practically immune to genjutsu, because their minds are protected, and some special powerful genjutsu that uses the Yamanaka clan bloodline to it's advantage. They also learn to communicate with one another telepathically over long distances, which only works because they are twins with the Yamanaka bloodline.
Naruto meets Jiraiya because Ino catches him peeping and calls Naruto telepathically to go get him, Naruto nearly gets knocked out by Jiriaya's summoned Frog, but uses the sexy no jutsu to try and trick him like he had against the 3rd or Ebisu, it doesn't work, but Jiraiya is entertained by it, and realizes who Naruto is, and offers to teach him to use his power. Because Naruto learned to enter his mindscape, he's able to learn to use the 'red chakra' in order to summon Gamabunta, in only one day.
Naruto's battle with Neji goes very differently, as Neji discovers Naruto's clones, which now all have better taijutsu skills, are a bit more dangerous, and he reveals his kaiten sooner, and doesn't get to press Naruto's tenketsu, Naruto ends up getting frustrated with Neji and uses his newly found bloodline techniques to force Neji to surrender, shocking much of the crowd.
Naruto's fight with Garra goes much the same, because Naruto discovers Garra's will is too strong for Naruto's jutsu to affect while he's awake, because he's had to resist possession from Shukaku for so long, and when asleep there isn't a point to it.
...
yeah...
So that's my idea so far...

by **Adyen** » Tue Jul 11, 2006 11:17 pm

I read everything up to the part where Ino gives her some of her knowledge and I stopped reading.
Let me go over this as my though goes:
First off, it's a great idea. I don't think it's been done before, and certainly it would be interesting to see how things go.
Secondly, it's easily understandable about not being able to read. Our dear Tsukino Usagi could barely pass a Kanji test at 14-15... much less the 11 years old Naruto.
Now, to the point where I completely just skipped down to reply to.
I am a fan of giving interesting power-ups to people (RED and RMMW will be examples of this), but an ability that allows the duplication of information would put Ino's ability WAY over the top.
Why aren't they Kage-level if they could just give every one of their members copy the knowledge of the strongest jutsus in the entire village? Heck, why would Snake-head want Sasuke if he could take Ino (or her family) and that ability instead? They'd be the perfect spies as well as perfect ninjas in terms of abilities!
Heck, Sakura wouldn't be top student if Ino can just copy information from her some smarter ninja or such.
Have Ino teach him how to read as a bonding experience or something, but do not give her an ability like that, unless you want it unique and Ino-centric.

by **Nekomata-sensei** » Wed Jul 12, 2006 1:00 am

I guess I oversimplified it. What Ino did couldn't have given Naruto the experience to read easily or perform techniques or anything, the Yamanaka clan can't copy jutsu or anything like that, at least not unless they have someone willing to sit still and allow them to read those parts of their mind, and even then, it's no better than having a scroll, they still have to go throuhg the process of learning the techniques. What Ino essentially did was download a dictionary and an academy textbook into Naruto's mind, and then made him study.
Naruto isn't suddenly able to read, he just had the knowledge to find out the meanings of kanji if he meditated on them and Ino had known them. He'd still be terribly slow at reading for a while, as if he was using a dictionary.
Yes, the Yamanaka can read minds, but it's very difficult, and someone with strong willpower, like Sakura, or with high inteligence and mental organization, like Shikamaru, or basically someone with jounin level mental dicipline would be able to negate their abilities without the Yamanaka abilities having a way to get around it. Their techniques only work properly on the weak minded, even their advanced techniques.
On top of that, most Yamanaka clan members don't have the mental ability to use more than the basic skill of the valentine. That's as far as Ino's dad got and he is a prominent chuunin. I was going for the whole psychic twins thing, and having Naruto and Ino be like Itachi equivalents for the Yamanaka clan, extreamly talented in their bloodline.

by **crystlshake** » Wed Jul 12, 2006 2:26 am

The communication thing isnt bad but the whole data download is a bit much to swallow. You could have her find out about his inability to read that way and maybe use the bloodline thing to teach him faster but its a perfect opportunity to build on the characters to just thow it away. Considering their past relationship (especially with the Sakukra dynamic) one revelation isnt going to make them all buddy buddy. Itll take some time to establish a more 'real' family connection than just supperficial (like if just adopted and met for fist time).
In addition you can play some interesting games with Hinata, Sakura and/or any other interested parties when they notice the two of them spending time together. You could have Sakura split between being glad Ino seems to have gotten an interest in someone not Sasuke and missing the attention Naruto would otherwise be giving her. Hinata may have mixed feelings about that kind of situation too. Not to mention it would draw attention to them finding out and the clan heads or other parties may not like that.

by **EdenB** » Wed Jul 12, 2006 4:05 am

It does sound like an interesting idea, as long as the 'data-download' as it was put wasn't over done. Though since I imagine even getting information about some techniques wouldn't let you learn them as well as a scroll, especially if it requires experience of previous techniques to understand, on top of only being able to read weak-willed people.
Crystlshake's idea of playing games with Hinata/Sakura/Clan heads/etc would proberly work quite well too. Though you'd proberly find Ino using Naruto as an excuse to visit team 7 (read team 7 as Sasuke) as well, if it's still near the start.

by **holyknight** » Mon Jul 17, 2006 6:26 pm

hmm...me and a friend were chatting...and he decided to try his hand with a derivation of this idea....
if you want to check his style of writing here is his FF.Net Profile link
http://www.fanfiction.net/u/511216/ :twisted:

by **Mitchell** » Fri Jul 21, 2006 6:30 pm

They posted chapter one today.
Two of a Mind by DarkstarShadowrose
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3057643/1/

by **Nekomata-sensei** » Fri Jul 21, 2006 6:47 pm

Mitchell wrote:They posted chapter one today.
Two of a Mind by DarkstarShadowrose
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3057643/1/

Wow, can't wait for it to update!

by **EdenB** » Fri Jul 21, 2006 7:01 pm

It is turning out pretty well.

by **Adyen** » Sat Jul 22, 2006 9:17 am

It's ok... but there are places where it seems... "off". Feels like I'm reading run-on sentences, and there are a few minor typoes in that glance-through I did.

by **bissek** » Sun Jul 23, 2006 12:52 pm

Downloading large amounts of data into somebody's head has been done in stories before. Two things to note: First, the trick can provide one with theoretical knowledge, but it doesn't magically grant the ability to put that theory into use. That takes training and practice. Second, dumping large amounts of information into one's head gives the receiver a headache. A 'Somebody threw a large rock at the inside of my skull' headache. The more data, the worse the headache. Extremely large amounts of data (Like downloading multiple languages into a man's head at once) will not kill you, but you'll probably wish that it had for an hour or two.

by **bissek** » Sun Jul 23, 2006 3:39 pm

Using a mind-reading technique can also be a weakness under certain circumstances. It's possible to cause a telepath considerable pain by deliberately thinking nonsense while being read (The examples I've seen used are thinking of random numbers or singing 'They Might Be Giants' songs nonstop). Also, looking into somebody's mind while fighting doesn't give as much as an advantage as you'd think. I refer you to vol 27 of Rurouni Kenshin, where Aoshi duels the mimicry master Suzaku. Suzaku could read analyze and duplicate Aoshi's techniques in midswing, but ended up getting beaten in one chapter. Why? Because Aoshi improvised new techniques on the fly, and it's impossible to mimic originality, by definition. By not thinking ahead, a telepath's edge is weakened considerably.

by **Nekomata-sensei** » Sun Jul 23, 2006 4:36 pm

bissek wrote:Using a mind-reading technique can also be a weakness under certain circumstances. It's possible to cause a telepath considerable pain by deliberately thinking nonsense while being read (The examples I've seen used are thinking of random numbers or singing 'They Might Be Giants' songs nonstop). Also, looking into somebody's mind while fighting doesn't give as much as an advantage as you'd think. I refer you to vol 27 of Rurouni Kenshin, where Aoshi duels the mimicry master Suzaku. Suzaku could read analyze and duplicate Aoshi's techniques in midswing, but ended up getting beaten in one chapter. Why? Because Aoshi improvised new techniques on the fly, and it's impossible to mimic originality, by definition. By not thinking ahead, a telepath's edge is weakened considerably.

Yeah, speaking of that, I was thinking of a similar thing to fool the advanced Sharingan into giving incorrect predictions of movements. A highly skilled martial artist, with a speed equal to or greater than the Sharingan user, who uses a reactive combat style and has fast enough reflexes, and is _really_ good at fients, could change their movments suddenly at the last moment.
An example of this that I was planning to use was neko-ken Ranma. I was thinking that Ranma's reflexes in the neko-ken would be fast enough that a Sharingan user (Kakashi, Sasuke or Itachi) will see the way neko-Ranma is going to move, react to it, and before they can react again, neko-Ranma has reacted to their preparation for it's previous movments, and attacked, completly avoiding their counterattack. Two Sharingan users fighting each other would have similar potential results, if one of them had better reflexes and taijutsu training than the other, even if their speeds were the same, and they had the same taijutsu style (copied).
But yeah, mind reading techniques and sharingan wouldn't be able to predict as well someone coming up with movments on the fly or with very good speed and reflexes reacting to the mind reading/sharingan user. That's probably why Naruto can almost hold his own against Sasuke in taijutsu by using lots of shadow clones, or Kyuubi chakra, while Sasuke has superior taitutsu copied, and the sharingan, and better speed, Naruto has a more reactive combat style and _much_ better reflexes, which don't rely on the enhanced perception of the sharingan.

by **holyknight** » Sun Jul 23, 2006 5:04 pm

Adyen wrote:It's ok... but there are places where it seems... "off". Feels like I'm reading run-on sentences, and there are a few minor typoes in that glance-through I did.

I know...what DSSR has many rips yet....i'm asking to those what read...to give sincere critics...beyond the simple "good or bad"...also i'm encouraging to contact him via MSN.....
If you have doubts..ask him and indicate what can be improved, and what ideas you have about the fic.......some will be used, some not...but the effort to aid a fellow writer to improve a fic is what is truly appreciated....

by **GenocideHeart** » Mon Jul 24, 2006 7:08 am

Nekomata-sensei wrote:Yeah, speaking of that, I was thinking of a similar thing to fool the advanced Sharingan into giving incorrect predictions of movements. A highly skilled martial artist, with a speed equal to or greater than the Sharingan user, who uses a reactive combat style and has fast enough reflexes, and is _really_ good at fients, could change their movments suddenly at the last moment.
An example of this that I was planning to use was neko-ken Ranma. I was thinking that Ranma's reflexes in the neko-ken would be fast enough that a Sharingan user (Kakashi, Sasuke or Itachi) will see the way neko-Ranma is going to move, react to it, and before they can react again, neko-Ranma has reacted to their preparation for it's previous movments, and attacked, completly avoiding their counterattack.

...you DO realize that Kyuubi-fied Naruto in the VotE was moving FASTER than Ranma in any of his modes, and yet Sasuke was still reacting to his attacks?
The Deus Ex Machigan has been overpowered to the point that right now, nobody can beat it, no matter how fast they move. And that, my friends, is the reason why I stopped reading Naruto. Too much blatant Uchiha love-love.

Temple of Ranma's Sailor Senshi Seifuku

Yamanaka Naruto

Yamanaka Naruto

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