Oh you mean the whole "had your best interests in mind the whole time"?
Yeah I call bull on that one too. Happosai is selfish and self centered. The only pet the dog moments are with kids...
LawOhki wrote:People who think they can handle a death, but end up doing so with all the tact, ability, and care of a blind pig attempting to put on make up.
Dumbledork wrote:What do you mean? Can you give an example?
yeah,LawOhki wrote:People who think they can handle a death, but end up doing so with all the tact, ability, and care of a blind pig attempting to put on make up.
I doubt that.LawOhki wrote:Sorry, I was a little subtle.
"Ryoga?" Ranma picked up the cursed piglet that had stopped and was spewing blood from his mouth. "What's wrong?"
Ryoga responded by coughing up more blood before finally ceasing to struggle, eyes closing as the piglet's heart stopped.
A moment passed without any movement.
"Ryoga?" Ranma couldn't believe her eyes. "Ryoga!"
The piglet didn't respond.
Ranma felt for a pulse and found none.
"Quack!" Mousse had pulled out medical supplies from under his wings.
"I… don't think that'll do any good." Ranma's head dropped. "He's dead."
Herb and her two Musk minions were already there, the formerly half dragon already walking into the water that would restore her.
However, at that moment, when the human girl was transformed back into a half dragon, disaster struck.
*COUGH* Herb's minions who were human/mammalian animal hybrids coughed up blood as they suddenly and painfully died.
Not that far away, a small, black pig was suffering the same fate.
Meanwhile, Ranma was walking into the dojo, having entered the property through the rear gate.
"Ranko!" Nodoka called out. "Please, can you help me?"
'Mom!' Ranma thought as she walked over to her mother. 'I'm not too late…'
"What do you want me to do?" Ranma asked as she knelt down before her mother.
"I want you to be my second… I always thought of you like the daughter I never had… Please… send me to my death so that I may see my son again," Nodoka cried.
"No! No!" Ranma shouted. "Don't do this!"
"I must… That's why I asked you… I don't think Akane could do this."
"No… No… before you do that, I… I need to show you something." Ranma pulled out the pail of preservation to get to the pot of liberation.
"Mom… I'm Ranma!" Ranma declared right before pouring the hot water over her head.
The hot water from the pot unlocked the curse, allowing Ranma to be male once more.
"DAHHHH!" He screamed in agony as blood spewed from his mouth and eyes. Clenching his chest, Ranma struggled to stay alive.
"Ranma!" Akane screamed as she ran into the dojo, witnessing him spasm on the floor.
"GRUNNKKK!" Ranma was dying fast, only his willpower allowing him to live thus far.
"Son?" Nodoka held Ranma in disbelief. "Ranma?"
Ranma nodded as he squirmed in his mother's lap, eyelids falling slowly.
"No! Ranma, you idiot!" Akane screamed as she cried uncontrollably, witnessing Ranma kill himself so that his mom could see him again.
"I love you, my son!" Nodoka cried, holding onto Ranma in his last moments.
Ranma smiled as his eyelids fell faster, happy to die with his mother's approval. He embraced the sweet stillness of death…
*Splash*
Ranma was soaked, female and unconscious… but alive.
Nodoka's looked upwards to see Akane holding the pail of preservation. "Akane?"
"I won't let him die…" Akane cried as she fell to her knees. "Please stay alive, Ranma… Please…."
Noy Telinú wrote:I admit, it WAS written more than a year ago and I didn't revise it much, but apparently it reeks. Sorry.
If it was, apparently so bad, why didn't anyone say anything until the person who told me to kill myself said it?
Please, either by PM, here or a new topic, tell me what I did wrong and how to fix it. I'd like that very much.
Now I don't care for Ranma being a demon or a succubus done too much and it tends to focus on Ranma having sex with guys.
Noy Telinú wrote:WHAT? THAT'S what's bugging you? They had a week to mourn and I'm terrible at people mourning too much.
And as for that, I was referring to the AA stories, but if you want to take offense, go ahead. And what does my love of Yuri have to do with anything? I love yuri. Yes. I just see it in the most positive light than the other ones. Put that's partly because I HATE anal sex (a thing that I see too much in fanfiction) since it's messing with POOP! Yuri has the least of that happening AND the girls can be... Girls. Yaoi has way too much submissive girly guys to be realistic to me.
uragaaru wrote:Let's change the subject: When characters restate, verbatim, facts that are told to us by a narrator. Why show us if you've already told us and vice-versa?
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