WARNING: This topic will contain some mature themes and some mild bad language that while I'm sure you can all handle, I feel better warning people about before they actually read something they might find offensive. This will be a Mature rated story after all.
Well, I've just gotten into the actual act of attempting to write my own stories, and its fun so far. But, I saw a challenge that I'd like to participate in, as having a framework to use makes the first couple stories easier to plot out. I'm referring to the F4 challenge, not because I have any aspiration to writing well enough to win it, but because it seems like a fun idea that will force me to write outside of my comfort zone, which so far seems to focus on the heavily cute.
At any rate, I just finished an outline for what I want to write, along with the prologue for what will become my entry to this challenge, and I'd like some feedback before I truly devote myself to completing this thing. What I have so far:
S/He's All That
A Ranma/A!MG humor fic
Disclaimer: As always, I own nothing, and I'm not even that creative, seriously, this isn't worth reading, much less pressing legal action on as I'm not gaining any profit from this, other than my own giggles.
My thought: Ranma’s pretty good at chaos, but he’s got nothing on Urd.
My premise: Urd/Mara have a bet that Urd cannot hook Skuld up. Urd decides that since Skuld is so anti-romance, she is either a lesbian, or just needs to see a certified hunk to get her libido flowing. Who better to try and get Skuld to fall for than Ranma Saotome, after all, he can be either a certified hunk o’beefcake or a complete babe. There’s no way Skuld can resist Ranma’s charms with Urd helping… oh wait, Urd’s helping. We’re all screwed. The title and terms of the bet come from She’s All That, a movie starring Freddie Prinze Jr trying to pretty up the ugly girl in school. Damn you high school romantic comedies from the late 90s, damn you.
Prologue: The Bet
Toltiir, feline Elder god of Mischief and Chaos, gathered a group of gods and goddesses at Mimir’s well to Bet on just how big a change a little pebble … wait a sec… scratch that. A Demoness and a Goddess walk into a bar. Well, actually, the Demoness was sitting at the bar nursing a warm sake and lamenting her most recent failure when the Goddess stumbled drunkenly into the bar…headfirst.
“Ouchie!” Urd, Goddess of the past and unofficial cupid of love groaned as she attempted to stop the world spinning long enough to make her way back to her feet.
“Urd,” Mara, Demoness first class, unlimited hissed.
“Wha…who’s there, oh hiya Mara,” Urd slurred out. “Hey barkeep, sake.”
“What are you DOING here Urd,” Mara’s eyes narrowed.
“Whoa, chill with the hostility girl, just for the night, drink?” Urd said.
“Fine, it’s not like the day could possibly get any worse, even if YOU have to be here,” Mara snatched up her new bottle of Sake, to find Urd blocking her with another bottle.
“What’s eating you, and toast before drink?” Urd interrupted.
“Fine.. whatever. To Hild-sama,” Mara inclined her bottle and took a long pull. “And you seriously cannot be so drunk that you don’t know what the problem is Urd.”
“I am NOT drinking to Hild, no way in Niflheim,” Urd grumbled.
“What’s wrong, don’t want to be a momma’s girl Urd-chan,” Mara sang.
“That woman is NOT my mother,” Urd screamed. “I’ve got it, to sex, love and all that good stuff.”
“Whatever,” Mara clinked her sake bottle to Urd’s and the both took a drink.
“Ah man, it’s been too long since we’ve done this Mara, where’d it all go wrong?” Urd said wistfully.
“Wow, you really must be smashed,” Mara quipped, though she couldn’t help that her mouth quirked a little smile before she ruthlessly squashed it. Hanging around Urd was… nice in a way, it reminded Mara of a time when she had some very good friends.
“Oh come on Mara-chan,” Urd teased, “I’m not that bad, we were best friends, I can’t help but wonder what went wrong.”
“Oh please, it’s completely obvious you heaven blasted imbecile,” Mara said.
“Fine, aside from the obvious then?”
“Um, no reason,” Mara sweatdropped, this she really hadn’t been expecting. All she wanted was a night to drown her sorrows after the magic lamp incident, was that really too much to ask? Naturally, one of the thrice blessed Norns had to show up to ruin a perfectly horrendous evening of pity, why, for the love of chaos, couldn’t anything go right for once?
-An hour and a completely unreasonable number of empty sake bottles later-
Urd and Mara were stumbling back towards the temple, having been kicked out of the bar for ‘disorderly behavior,’ the details of which are too ghastly to print. Suffice to say, none of the men in the bar would ever look at sheep, pool cues, or edamame the same way ever again. “Look girl, all I’m shaaying is that the Shquirt is waaay too uptight,” Urd said.
“Damn right, the kid acts like she’s got a bug shoved up her *^!^,” Mara replied as she stumbled sideways into a parked car. “*&^# Who the heaven put a car there?” Mara launched a bolt of black lightning that toasted the paint off the front half of the car.
“Tee hee, nice aim,” Urd slurred out. “I mean, the Shquirt can’t even handle Bell and Keiichi kissing, we have to help her shomehow. She’sh a total prude, it can’t be good for her. And she keepsh ruining all my plans to get Bell shome.”
“URD, I’ve got it!” Mara declared and flashed a victory sign with her hand. “We’ve gotta get the kid laid!”
“Hohohohoho, brilliant. Don’t worry Shquirt, Urd, the Cupid of Looooove is on the case. We’ll have you a grade A hunk o’beefcake before you can blink baby sishter!” Urd posed and thrust her chest out suggestively, legs slightly parted, arms cocked to the side with a wink.
“Ohh really, big words from shomeone who can’t even get Belldandy and her pretty boy fiancé in the shack,” Mara taunted.
“Oh ya? I bet you I can find Shkuld someone she’ll just love!” Urd declared.
“Sure you will, put up or shut up, Urdie.”
“Fine, terms?” Urd asked, momentarily serious, well, as serious as Urd on 15 bottles of sake can ever be, which is surprisingly enough is more serious than Urd on zero bottles of sake can manage.
“What, really? Okay, you have until the end of the semester to get Skuld to fall in love with someone of your choice,” Mara said.
“Alright, wager?” Urd said.
“Loser becomes the slave of the winner for a week,” Mara said with a vicious smirk.
“Naw, that’s no fun. I’ve got it, loser has to attend Keiichi’s graduation at the end of the semester naked and jump on stage when it’s his turn to get his diploma.”
Mara looked at Urd for a moment and said one word, “Deal.”
[Scene two: Urd hits up Yggdrassil to find the perfect boy for Skuld, oh wait, is Skuld straight? Better ask Bell, except she’s as oblivious as Kasumi, better cover all the bases and get a hunk and a babe for Skuld-chan. She finds Ranma’s file.]
[Scene three: The heist, Urd convinces either Mara or Hild to help her kidnap Ranma, after all, demons probably do family bonding over mild kidnapping. Somehow Urd either casts a compulsion on Ranma to stick around Nekomi, or uses some formula 411 or something to get him to stay.]
[Scene four: Skuld, meet your new boyfrie… errr… girlfrie …. Errr… significant other, naturally, things DO NOT GO WELL, say hello to angry hammer sister #2 (Akane still gets top billing on this one)]
[Scene 5: Chaos in Nerima, where’s Ranma.]
[Scene 6: A day in the life, of really unfortunate, awkward situations. Skuld walks in on Ranma-chan in the bath and discovers that our kidnapping victim is a natural redhead, is dead sexy, and thanks to Urd’s meddling with a love potion, over-amorous. Cue nude Ranma-chan chasing Skuld all over the temple, glomping her whenever she winds up in range. Think koi-rod on speed, after all, it is Urd doing this. In a desperate maneuver, Skuld splashes Ranma with hot water to change him back.. big mistake, did I mention big, because ya, its big. Skuld freezes up and blushes. Ranma glomps her, Urd takes pictures, Belldandy goes “Oh my,” Skuld unfreezes and goes into bash the pervert mode while thinking about just how much whipped cream she’d like to lick off of Ranma’s hot bod. Ranma gets knocked unconscious (he’s tough, but she’s a goddess)]
[Scene 7: The Nerima crew searches the greater Tokyo region, hijinks ensue, Akane gets her hair shaved, Shampoo gets captured by Asuza, Genma winds up drugged by Kodachi and makes amorous advances on a male panda in the zoo, Soun cries a bunch, Kasumi says “Oh my” and Nabiki just cracks up.]
[Scene 8: Big Fight! Ranma vs. Banpei, the temple gets half destroyed. Mara laughs.]
[Scene 9: Ranma is blackmailed by Urd into taking Skuld out on a “date” that gets crashed by Urd (trying to help) and Mara (trying to hinder) they wind up going for ice cream (I can just see two ravenous young girls saying “iceeeeee creeeeaaam”)]
[Scene 10: Ranma and Skuld talk, decide to be friends in spite of the fact that Urd kidnapped Ranma and no one can undo her spells to keep him around. Ranma decides to teach Skuld a little of the art, Skuld decides to go look up Ranma’s file. Oh shit, he killed a god, Skuld is scared, and Ranma is inexplicably immortal for having killed Saffron and on the list of possible gods, and what’s this, Kami-sama has a contract with one Genma Saotome to marry one of his daughters to Genma’s firstborn in exchange for paying off a bar tab. So does Hild? Uh-oh, Mara and Skuld as legitimate fiancés.]
[Scene 11: Ranma gets locked by having her first period. Hijinks ensue.]
[Scene 12: Nermia comes to Nekomi, Mara’s been hanging off of Ranma, trying to seduce him to make sure Urd can’t win. Shampoo finds them in a compromising position. Obstacles are for killing. Little fight, Mara kicks the shit out of Shampoo and locks her as a cat. Nekoken time with a still female Ranma. Chibi-Hild was watching, and just can’t resist blasting Ranma-neko-chan with catnip. Ranma-neko-chan gets *very* friendly with Skuld.]
[Scene 13: Skuld is embarrassed that Ranko-neko gave her an orgasm in public just by rubbing up against her. Skuld avoids Ranma but is starting to like him/her. Sexuality issues and doesn’t want to add to Ranma’s troubles.]
[Scene 14: The Tendos come to town, try to guilt Ranma to come back with the honor promise, Urd brings up heaven’s contract for Genma’s firstborn far before anyone else. Mara brings up her own status, and dares those foolish mortals to stand in her way of getting some good tail]
[Scene 15: Skuld learns that Ranma has been taught to ignore all learning other than martial arts and decides to help him learn some other things and gives him decent reasons why he should. They learn to tolerate ea other.]
[Scene 16: Ranma and Skuld talk about what Ranma really wants out of life. Mara interrupts and tries to seduce Ranma. Skuld offers to get her father to annul the contract because she doesn’t want to cause Ranma more trouble, which he finds to be amazing since it is the first time that anyone has considered his feelings since he was taken from home.]
[Scene 17: Mara and Urd talk. Urd calls Mara out on wanting Ranma. Mara counters that she’s just having fun, he’s really not her type, and she’s much more into a certain sexy platinum haired goddess/childhood friend, except eep, she really really didn’t mean to say that. Urd, who goes both ways and is incredibly capricious, and is drunk on sake, decides to take Mara to bed.]
[Scene 18: Skuld and Ranma decide that hey, might as well give this a try, Ranma gives Skuld a very tentative kiss and they go out for ice cream. When Ranma changes to female to eat her ice cream, she stops being affectionate at all to Skuld because she doesn’t want to imply that Skuld is a pervert, and Skuld kisses Ranma-chan forcefully. Ranma completely breaks down because this is the first time that ANYONE has acknowledged his girl side as not being a problem, and he’s damn near the breaking point in terms of wanting acceptance.]
[Scene 19: Since everyone interfering in their relationship is busy in the craziness that is Ranma, Bell and Keiichi have sex! Urd catches them in the act!]
[Scene 20: Skuld discovers the bet and gets really really mad at Urd. Big fight #3: Skuld vs. Urd, kaboom! Mara and Hild laugh their respective asses off at them. Ranma calms Skuld down by pointing out that they do actually kinda like ea other.]
[The end (well, what I hope to get written for the challenge), Ranma and Skuld have decided that they like dating each other enough to still continue, Ranma is happy to be away from Nerima for the time being, but they aren’t seriously in love yet. So, who wins the bet? Urd did hook them up, but it isn’t serious enough to be a decisive victory. Skuld decides that since they made a bet on her, the only way to make reparations is for them to both go nude to the graduation, which they do. Ze End for now.]
That’s all I’ve got for now. I will pick this story up as soon as I get the next chapter of DRE completed. I saw this challenge and this just seemed like a good idea. The other thing I was thinking was Ranma gets kidnapped by L-sama and brainwashed into stalking Lina Inverse, but Urd just strikes me as the sort to actually do something like this.