A "What if..."

Bridging the gap between Ideas and C&C.

Post individual scenes that need doctoring, outlines, or other detail work that isn't quite ready for the C&C thread.

A "What if..."

Postby Tuisto » Fri May 22, 2009 11:24 pm

You took something silly or cheesy, and crossed it with some awesome?



*Treat the following like a movie trailer and click the music link when you reach it*



“Mr. President?”

“I’ve got a busy schedule today.”

“You may have to put some meetings on hold then, this may take a while.”

“This better be good…”

“Sir, I’ll be frank… Do you believe in magical girls?”

“What?”



-My name is Alexander Remington. Most people just call me Alex. For years I worked for the CIA. I can’t tell you about the things I’ve done, but the basics are simple enough. My job was to take lives.-

“Take the shot…”
BANG!
“Target Neutralized.”

=== http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=flnsA7GQ ... re=related ===

-Then, I stumbled onto something a little different.

“Wait, intruder spotted, how’d he get past the perimiter?!"

-Now my job is to save lives…

“Did you kill it?
“I think so…”
“What do you think these things want?”
“Us… Dead”

-All our lives.

“So what are we going to do about it man?”

“… Kill them first.”

+FLASH+

[AN URBAN LEGEND?]

=Eyewitnesses reported seeing a monster fighting a young …=

“Female, ages between twelve and sixteen, usually wearing extremely impractical clothing and manipulating supernatural abilities beyond scientific understanding….”

“Like those anime shows about love and justice?”


+FLASH+

[NOTHING BUT FANTASY?]

“This guy dropped twelve of our best agents and ate more gunfire than I’d like to imagine, and she dropped him in one shot.”

“We won’t be so lucky next time…”

+FLASH+

[WHAT IF EVERYTHING YOU KNOW ABOUT MAGICAL GIRLS…]

“I got her, she’s safe! But, Man you’re not going to believe this…”

“What?”

[WERE TRUE?]

“They really do wear miniskirts and high heals…”

[EXCEPT FOR ONE]

“She cries like a little girl…”

[SMALL]

“She IS a little girl…”

[THING]


“Fourteen deaths in the target demographic range in the last six months globally.”

“So? People are murdered all the time, we’re assholes that way. How are these related?”

“They were reportedly all killed by some kind monster man…”

[NOW]

- Whoever we’re up against isn’t as stupid as you’d wish they were.

“These girls are just kids, they couldn’t fight their way out of a wet paper bag.

- They plan like we do.

“ How are they supposed to handle a war?”

- They hide like we do

“With Love in their hearts?”

- They KILL, like we do.

“Only if Love and Justice are the names of a new brand of Rocket Launcher.”

[THE RACE IS ON]

“We’ve got more firepower.”

“We don’t know where to hit them.”

“We have global intelligence.”

“They’re not from Earth.”

“We have NUKES!”

“We kill ourselves to kill them.”

“You’re really not making this easy….”

[TO FIND THE ONES THAT ARE LEFT]

“It’s like chess, we make a move, they make a move, first one to corner the king wins.”

“Then we’ll just need to turn our pawns into queens.”

“How? They’re glass cannons, one sniper round and they’re just as dead as anyone else.”

“I lasted this long being just human, so it should be enough.”

“You’re crazy.”

[BEFORE TIME]

“Am I really?”



“She just pulled a three foot staff out of thin air dude…”

[RUNS OUT]

“Maybe not…”

“Alex?”

“Yes?”

“What is this thing supposed to do?”

“…Willia-“

“Do I look like a magical talking cat to you?”


BOOM

“You’ve got to distract him while I prepare a spell!”

“How the hell am I supposed to do that? Chastise his ass with a self righteous speech?!”

“I have a plan!”

“What?!”

“We’ll use car-tillery!”

“We’ll WHAT?”


+FLASH+

[MONSTERS]

“We know they aren’t stupid, but all signs indicate they’d get their asses kicked in a straight fight, so why are they even bothering?”

“They probably have a doomsday plan…”

“A WHAT?”

“A doomsday plan. A final goal they’re moving towards that will allow them to crush us all in one fell swoop…”

“Man! When are you going to stop taking all your notes out of those stupid children’s cartoons.”

“It’s gotten us this far hasn’t it”

“This is stupid man…”


+FLASH+

[GIRLS]

“Tokyo Tower, the Space Needle, Eiffel Tower, the Empire State Building… So far we’ve found them all, dead or alive, within fifty miles of these landmarks..”

“They’re looking for something…. Or someone.”

“Who? We’ve assembled the surviving girls and kicked their ass on every continent now.”

“The last girl man…”

“Say again?”

“In your stupid cartoons, the Bad Guys would probably be after the last girl, the supposed Team Leader. You know the one man. She’d be the one who can fuck up their plans all on her own if she knew she could.”

“Then find her-“

“Already have a lead…”

“Who?”

+FLASH+

[MAGIC]

“Excuse me, could you let me out of here now?”

“YOU SPOKE!”

“What? Never seen birds talk before?”

“Well, normally its parrots…”

“Whatever. Look, you’re in danger.”

+FLASH+

[MEN]

“The president’s daughter?”

“That’s convenient…”

“No, it’s bad… very bad.”

“Man… She’s got to be the single most protected girl on the planet.”

“They know that, and they’ll be ready.”

+FLASH+

[IN THIS WAR]

“Armor pierceing!”

+FLASH+

[CAN]

“Fifity Caliber!”

+FLASH+

[WE]

“Anything that explodes!”

+FLASH+

[SURVIVE?]

“If it violates the Geneva Conventions, pack it!”

“Alex!”

“What?”

“What do you want me to do?”

“You’re a magical girl… You have a job.”

O_o?

“You get to save the world.”



MAGICAL
GIRL


"All our lives depend on making sure SHE stays alive..."

"OW!!!! I stubbed my toe..."

"We're all going to die, aren't we?"


+CUT TO BLACK+


Voiceover: "Hi! My names Serena, I guess I'm just your typical teen girl, tryin' to get good grades and hang out with my friends at the arcade or mall, you know, talking about love...

[scene fades in to show a burning city behind a blond girl in short skirt, bleeding, pulling herself from the ruble]

Voiceover: "... but then there's monster attacks, and I fight evil by moonlight, I'm a Warrior of Love and Justice!"

[scene shows the girl raising a golden and jeweled wand into the air, the look on her faces promising vengeance.]

+FLASH+

+CUT TO BLACK+


RATED PG-13


= = = = =

It's what happens when you do something to the Magical Girl genre...

Make people behave like their age and IQ mattered. On both sides of the Good/Bad line.

Take Sailor Moon, leave it in the sun to ferment all the sweetness out of it, then mix in some Jason Bourne and X-Files, sprinkle in a dash of Samuel L Jackson... Simmer on low heat for a couple of hours, remove from heat, and wait five minutes before serving with a side of guns and explosions.


Comments?
Death Threats?
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Re: A "What if..."

Postby Kilich » Sat May 23, 2009 1:49 am

That was Amazing. I was laughing for several minutes, non stop.

Also, I liked the style.
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Re: A "What if..."

Postby Tuisto » Sat May 23, 2009 8:49 pm

Thanks, I think I'll flesh it out some, and see where it goes from there.
But I know that I'm only doing this as a "Trailer". Don't expect anything elaborate right now.
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Re: A "What if..."

Postby Comartemis » Tue May 26, 2009 9:19 pm

Didn't your mother teach you not to try to pass other peoples' ideas off as your own, Tuisto? That's AdmiralTigerClaw's post from Spacebattles, he linked me to it the night before last while he was using me as a sounding board for developing the idea.

Shame on you. And be happy we don't have a reputation system. :x
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Currently Reading: Sora no Otoshimono

KILL the darkfic. BURN the angst. PURGE the Bad End.
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Re: A "What if..."

Postby Tuisto » Wed May 27, 2009 12:39 am

Yeah, I know, I copied.
So?
I didn't claim it was mine. Damn funny though.
But there is now this idea of doing a whole "movie trailer" type series I've got gestating in my brain for various animes. That idea he does deserve credit for. Though I'll have to write an entire new entity as his drabble was hardly publishable worthy.
If he has a problem with me running with the idea (which isn't really original, just a different spin), well, he can email me... then... well... I'll see.

Seriously. "FanFiction", we're continuously ripping off other peoples ideas for our own twisted devices. And those persons had to actually make a living off of their ideas/shows/books etc. "Reputation system"? feh... Maybe TC should sound off to Naoko Takeuchi and Rob Ludlum.

If a MOD here wants to delete this thread, well okee-dokey, you wanna' excoriate me some more, fine. I have a really, really hard time caring.


On another note, what are the odds of two persons, at random, both visiting the same two esoteric fandom forums? Really, that's astounding! :P
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Re: A "What if..."

Postby Comartemis » Wed May 27, 2009 9:39 am

Yeah, I know, I copied.
So?
I didn't claim it was mine. Damn funny though.

You didn't tell people that it wasn't yours, which is just as bad. If I hadn't called you on it, you would have gotten away with hijacking another author's idea. That's plagiarism of the highest order.

Seriously. "FanFiction", we're continuously ripping off other peoples ideas for our own twisted devices.

We also give credit to the original sources and acknowledge that the ideas our works are based on belong to other people. You did not do this; instead you posted an idea someone else labored to come up with and then allowed people to think it was yours. Again, that is plagiarism, and in this community it is an unforgivable sin.

On another note, what are the odds of two persons, at random, both visiting the same two esoteric fandom forums? Really, that's astounding! :P

Not so much as you might think. Arkeus and I both hang out on the Nanoha boards on AnimeSuki for instance, and I see several people from AnimeSuki leaving comments on pictures posted to Danbooru all the time, especially Keroko.
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