The NEW Fanfiction Quote Topic

Where stuff about fanfiction that doesn't fit into any other category goes. Try to make sure that new topics here actually couldn't actually go somewhere else.

Re: The NEW Fanfiction Quote Topic

Postby Té Rowan » Thu Jul 21, 2011 4:38 pm

“Hmm, Ranma, why do you have a key-shaped magic staff following you?” Nabiki questioned with a raised eyebrow as Ranma walked into the tearoom.

Whipping around, Ranma saw the time staff make a clumsy attempt to hide itself behind a wall.

“Not this again,” Ranma muttered as the staff hopped over to him.

“Again?” Nabiki questioned just before Kasumi stepped into the tearoom from outside.

“Hello, Staff-chan. What are you doing here?” Kasumi questioned as it hopped up to her.

The staff’s reply was to bounce up and down and pulse with magical energy for a moment.

“Oh how nice of you to help Ranma, Staff-chan!” Kasumi exclaimed with a smile before walking off towards the kitchen.

Ranma’s answer to this was to bang his head on a nearby support pillar a few times before walking off, time staff following closely behind.

A moment later, Nabiki finally decided that “For once I don’t want to know,” before returning to her ledgers.

From master_magi's "Chaos and Crystal Tokyo"
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Re: The NEW Fanfiction Quote Topic

Postby CRBWildcat » Sat Aug 13, 2011 3:47 pm

A segment from Magnificent Sasquatch's Average Joe In Bullet Hell:

"Whew. Thanks, Ran!" I call, starting down the stairs. Having reached the bottom, I throw the door open, and take my first step-

-wait, WAIT!

All the excitement, I totally forgot! Okuu got attacked! I'm sure she whooped the guy hard, but…even so!

"Yukari!" I shut the door and turn back, making for the living room. "Yukari, you there?"

I could see her right away as I rounded the corner. The great and mighty overseer was now, in essence, a raw couch potato, hazy eyes directed towards the plasma screen ahead of her. Good lord, she's practically sinking into the plush material, she's so lazy. I mean, we were just talking fifteen minutes ago!

…Well, now, what's this? An air horn?


"Hey Yuk-aaaaaaaa-riiiii~?" I sing, edging closer.



"GYAHHHHHH!" The blonde shoots from her seat, literally! To my dismay, she opens a gap in the roof to keep from slamming her head into it, and sets the opening to the floor, eliminating any potential pain factor. Ah, now you're thinking with portals, Yukari!

"Ryan," Yukari begins slowly with a menacing tone, "you'd best have a very good reason for turning my own air horn on me."

"You want to hurl me through a gap?" I ask nonchalantly, tossing the can-horn off to the side. "If so, could you please aim it at the underground, Satori's place specifically?"

"…" Yukari's expression softens. Of course, I figured she'd get it right away. "Consider yourself lucky I appreciate the chivalry in your intent. Otherwise, I'd seal you in a dimension filled with respawning fairies?"

Erm…ah-ha… You're kidding right? Gulp.

"Th-The kind with the annoyingly high voices?" I ask. Yukari smirks deviously.

"Big time."

OH LORD, A NAVI DIMENSION! My ears, they already bleed!

Quick Man- erm…quick, man! To the floor!

"I'm sorry-I'm sorry-I'm sorry!" I three-peat, kneeling in Wily's "please forgive me" pose.

"Goodness," Ran muttered, coming around the corner, "what did you do to him?"

"Take note, Ran." Yukari grinned triumphantly. "Never underestimate the bargaining power of a fictional nuisance."
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Re: The NEW Fanfiction Quote Topic

Postby Té Rowan » Sun Aug 14, 2011 2:18 pm

"At least you didn't come up with the North American Magical Bureau of Legal Authority."

"You never did tell me what was so funny about that."

"There's a reason for that," Harry replied. "I'd rather you keep your innocence."

"My innocence?" Hermione was shocked. "What could be worse than the year we spent on the run fighting Voldemort and his Death Eaters? Than watching Lucius die?"

Harry snorted. "Knowing the full meaning of NAMBLA."

-- Royal Flush by Lansydyr
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Re: The NEW Fanfiction Quote Topic

Postby talonhunter » Sun Aug 14, 2011 8:47 pm

A Trip To SAM's Club
Yesterday I was at my local SAM'S CLUB buying a large bag of Purina
dog chow for my loyal pet, Biscuit, the Wonder Dog, and was in the
checkout line when the woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
What did she think I had, an elephant? So since I'm retired and have
little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I
was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't,
because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50
pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes
coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that
it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat
one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so
it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to
mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the
dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an
Irish Setter's ass and a car hit us both.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was
laughing so hard.
Sam's Club won't let me shop there anymore.
Better watch what you ask retired people! They have all the time in the
world to think of crazy things to say.

(A text I got and was planning to use in passing for a scene from Gunslinger Girl 1/2)
Who needs the light when the shadows are so much more...Playful

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Re: The NEW Fanfiction Quote Topic

Postby Crescent Pulsar R » Thu Aug 18, 2011 12:05 pm

This is something from Tail Kinker's Pale Horse:

Happosai to Ranma wrote:"Nonetheless, you've earned my gratitude and my respect. And to repay you, so that I can go back to treating you like dirt, I'm going to give you this."

It just sort of tickled my funny bone. ;p
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