A segment from Magnificent Sasquatch's Average Joe In Bullet Hell:
"Whew. Thanks, Ran!" I call, starting down the stairs. Having reached the bottom, I throw the door open, and take my first step-
All the excitement, I totally forgot! Okuu got attacked! I'm sure she whooped the guy hard, but…even so!
"Yukari!" I shut the door and turn back, making for the living room. "Yukari, you there?"
I could see her right away as I rounded the corner. The great and mighty overseer was now, in essence, a raw couch potato, hazy eyes directed towards the plasma screen ahead of her. Good lord, she's practically sinking into the plush material, she's so lazy. I mean, we were just talking fifteen minutes ago!
…Well, now, what's this? An air horn?
"Hey Yuk-aaaaaaaa-riiiii~?" I sing, edging closer.
"GYAHHHHHH!" The blonde shoots from her seat, literally! To my dismay, she opens a gap in the roof to keep from slamming her head into it, and sets the opening to the floor, eliminating any potential pain factor. Ah, now you're thinking with portals, Yukari!
"Ryan," Yukari begins slowly with a menacing tone, "you'd best have a very good reason for turning my own air horn on me."
"You want to hurl me through a gap?" I ask nonchalantly, tossing the can-horn off to the side. "If so, could you please aim it at the underground, Satori's place specifically?"
"…" Yukari's expression softens. Of course, I figured she'd get it right away. "Consider yourself lucky I appreciate the chivalry in your intent. Otherwise, I'd seal you in a dimension filled with respawning fairies?"
Erm…ah-ha… You're kidding right? Gulp.
"Th-The kind with the annoyingly high voices?" I ask. Yukari smirks deviously.
OH LORD, A NAVI DIMENSION! My ears, they already bleed!
Quick Man- erm…quick, man! To the floor!
"I'm sorry-I'm sorry-I'm sorry!" I three-peat, kneeling in Wily's "please forgive me" pose.
"Goodness," Ran muttered, coming around the corner, "what did you do to him?"
"Take note, Ran." Yukari grinned triumphantly. "Never underestimate the bargaining power of a fictional nuisance."
Senshi of Zeta Aquilae
Spammer Rank C --- from Himitsu, 10-25-07. "Holy @!#%!, she made Zelas cry."
Quote of the Week: "Friendship isn't always easy, but there's no doubt it's worth fighting for!" -- Twilight SparkleProject: Spam Sandwich is on hiatus until further notice.