Return ch27

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Re: Return ch27

Postby Konsaki » Wed Feb 16, 2011 2:54 am

Sunshine wrote:Huh, don't see the crossover section on the options with Ranma and Sailor Moon.
Will have to do that tomorrow.

Welcome to the future! :P
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Re: Return ch27

Postby Undeen » Wed Feb 16, 2011 1:08 pm

As always I loved the update, but I do have a question. Not terribly important, but it bugs me... :P

This is listed as chapter 27 while the previous chapter was listed as part 2 of chapter 25 (says 22, but I assume that's a typo on FF.net) so I have to ask since I haven't seen anyone else bring it up: What happened to chapter 26? Is it just a mistake or is it intentional and I just missed something? Wouldn't be the first time...
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Re: Return ch27

Postby Sunshine Temple » Wed Feb 16, 2011 6:44 pm

Undeen wrote:As always I loved the update, but I do have a question. Not terribly important, but it bugs me... :P

This is listed as chapter 27 while the previous chapter was listed as part 2 of chapter 25 (says 22, but I assume that's a typo on FF.net) so I have to ask since I haven't seen anyone else bring it up: What happened to chapter 26? Is it just a mistake or is it intentional and I just missed something? Wouldn't be the first time...


Yeah that's a typo.
That chapter 22 should be chapter 26.



Konsaki wrote:Welcome to the future! :P


All I see is the Sailor-Moon crossover category, and I can't have more than one selected.
I dunno, Ranma (or a character named Ranma) is still the main character.
On the other hand, the SM mythos is more influential than that of R1/2
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Re: Return ch27

Postby PCHeintz72 » Wed Feb 16, 2011 10:18 pm

Sunshine wrote:All I see is the Sailor-Moon crossover category, and I can't have more than one selected.
I dunno, Ranma (or a character named Ranma) is still the main character.
On the other hand, the SM mythos is more influential than that of R1/2

Well... I would not change it then... I do not know why you cannot see the category though.
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Re: Return ch27

Postby Sunshine Temple » Wed Feb 16, 2011 10:29 pm

PCHeintz72 wrote:Well... I would not change it then... I do not know why you cannot see the category though.


I might have missed it. But I did try twice. Strange.
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Re: Return ch27

Postby Nadrek » Sat Feb 19, 2011 4:06 pm

Brief comments on v3a:

'advantage of this meeting to discus... countermeasures.' - discuss, not discus

I'm somewhat disappointed we didn't see more of JTF2; they're fun, and has just been introduced to their demonic instructors. At least some mention of those duties in the "you need to relax" section would seem appropriate; not just Usagi.

The Rune Order may also decide Murdock spilled; which also means they've got some hard choices to make. Stay in the shadows as an active enemy of the Company (foolish, now that they've been outed, but perhaps they have blinkers on regarding their SOP), take a much more active role, or try to negotiate a peace.

Perhaps Ranma will continue to get over her rather unhealthy fascination with Usagi.
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Re: Return ch27

Postby Sunshine Temple » Sat Feb 19, 2011 5:43 pm

Nadrek

Brief comments on v3a:

'advantage of this meeting to discus... countermeasures.' - discuss, not discus
[Ouch, can correct that.

I'm somewhat disappointed we didn't see more of JTF2; they're fun, and has just been introduced to their demonic instructors. At least some mention of those duties in the "you need to relax" section would seem appropriate; not just Usagi.

[This is the core problem of having lots and lots of characters.
[Good point on at least mentioning them.

[Added in these two sections.

[[
"You listen to Kasumi, maybe she'll let you wear goggles or at least a cup," Ranma said as she made it towards the door.
Kasumi smirked minutely.
Rei paused. "Wait... a cup? We're... female."
Ranma raised an eyebrow and glanced to Kasumi. "JTF2 didn't complain this much did they?"
Kasumi shrugged. "They're experienced soldiers; they're just inexperienced with the supernatural."
"Ah, well the reverse doesn't exactly work does it." The redhead sighed.
"JTF2?" Kiri asked. "What do the Canadian special forces have to do with this?"
Ranma rubbed her forehead. "Nevermind, just don't be too angry if you forget that women need protection down there just as much as men."
Makoto, who had more martial training, winced and nodded her head in agreement.
"Like the time you used your SSP against Galina?" Kasumi innocently asked.
]]

[[
"Since when does great DarkStar seek the approval of a WIC Colonel?"
Putting the half eaten plum down, Ranma looked down at the silent broodlings clinging to her staring at her.
"Also when does Executor Edwards ask if a special contractor can handle a simple job? Repeatedly."
"You all knew." Ranma exhaled, she closed her eyes and concentrated on sensing her daughter's heartbeats, anything to keep her from curling up.
Kasumi nodded. "And it's not just overwork, it's the kind of work you're doing, or not doing. This Tsukino stuff has kept you from training that JTF2 platoon, and they really should see what a powerful Pattern D is capable of."
Nodoka shook her head. "No Dear, we were all worried but then your daughters started talking with Lieutenant Tendo and myself."
]]

The Rune Order may also decide Murdock spilled; which also means they've got some hard choices to make. Stay in the shadows as an active enemy of the Company (foolish, now that they've been outed, but perhaps they have blinkers on regarding their SOP), take a much more active role, or try to negotiate a peace.

[Indeed. The Rune Order has some tough decisions. Their goal is the control of Usagi (who they see as a very, very dangerous, but useful person).
[So does Murdock too.


[[
"Well, I squealed on several groups of very scary people to another group of scary people, and that isn't even counting the rank disappointment many of these scary people had in me. First I'm going to find a quiet place and have a very large drink and then... well what do you think I'm going to do?" Murdock mocked before breaking the connection.
"Run, hide, and whimper. Like a little girl." Mercury's glare at the dead phone softened. "Not a bad idea," she admitted, grinning slightly. Some distance could be beneficial, and she did know of a place.
]]


Perhaps Ranma will continue to get over her rather unhealthy fascination with Usagi.

[The stress and feelings she's having now are changing her fascination with Usagi.
[Mostly by underscoring the unhealthy nature of a lot of it.

[If those additions are good I can add them to the story and update it.
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Re: Return ch27

Postby Nadrek » Sat Feb 19, 2011 9:37 pm

Those additions look good; the reference to JTF2 has hints of both not properly balancing professional responsibilities, and of babysitting JTF2 being much more pleasant than babysitting Usagi.

Murdock's call to Ami was always amusing
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Re: Return ch27

Postby Sunshine Temple » Sat Feb 19, 2011 11:40 pm

Nadrek
Those additions look good; the reference to JTF2 has hints of both not properly balancing professional responsibilities, and of babysitting JTF2 being much more pleasant than babysitting Usagi.

[Excellent. Did want to do that. Especially given that a full scene with them couldn't fit in the chapter itself.

Murdock's call to Ami was always amusing

[Excellent. The alteration there was more to bring in line with some foreshadowing and related to the Rune Order issue.

[Changes uploaded with V3b

[Thanks for the help. Now I ask this knowing I just updated the ff.net version too...
[But any other suggestions for the chapter?
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Re: Return ch27

Postby Cheb » Sun Feb 20, 2011 6:39 am

All I see is the Sailor-Moon crossover category, and I can't have more than one selected.

As I understand it, the "Sailor Moon X-overs" section of FFnet is obsolete, supported for compatibility only. When I marked my story as x-over I first chose plain "Sailor Moon" in the first drop-down box, then "Ranma" in the second one.
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Re: Return ch27

Postby Sunshine Temple » Sun Feb 20, 2011 10:52 am

Which crossover selection?

The ones I try, Anime> Crossovers, and Misc > Crossovers don't allow me to select which series it's crossing.
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Re: Return ch27

Postby Pale Wolf » Sun Feb 20, 2011 6:05 pm

Ah, no, those are singular sections.

When you're publishing a story, you first get a story type window - normal, and crossover. You'd want to pick crossover, and then you get to choose two series.

If you go into the edit story properties window, you'll see the normal/crossover thing right above its title and summary. Mark it and pick your crosses.

Though I'm not actually sure - I've heard that stuff tossed in crossover categories doesn't show up in the regular category, is that true?
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Re: Return ch27

Postby Sunshine Temple » Sun Feb 20, 2011 8:45 pm

Ahhh, now I see.
Missed that setting.

Well changed it over.
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Re: Return ch27

Postby Konsaki » Mon Feb 21, 2011 1:56 am

Pale Wolf wrote:Though I'm not actually sure - I've heard that stuff tossed in crossover categories doesn't show up in the regular category, is that true?
Unfortunately, this is true, but I can see the point as it tries to have only original series listed without any crossovers... in reality, it just means that lazy authors or authors who dont know the crossover feature are shown in the regular listing.
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Re: Return ch27

Postby Sunshine Temple » Mon Feb 21, 2011 6:55 am

Konsaki wrote:Unfortunately, this is true, but I can see the point as it tries to have only original series listed without any crossovers... in reality, it just means that lazy authors or authors who dont know the crossover feature are shown in the regular listing.


Thinking on it, Return does belong in the crossover sections of R.5 and SM. Especially given how... fluid the canon has become relative to the current plot/characterization.
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