Temple of Ranma's Sailor Senshi Seifuku

I've considered where to put this, and decided to place this here. If I'm wrong and that it should go somewhere else, mods are welcome to either tell me to move it or move it themselves. :D Anyways, here's a little bit of what I've done. Tell me honestly what you think, and whether you feel it works...

I'm going to wait till I go through the new version before posting more C&C, cause you might have been told those that I find already... ^^;;;

Seems like I work longer hours than you do... Quote: "Of course, Shampoo's probably a better marital artist than all of you combined, tenacious too. Then there's Janet, bright girl." Just to clarify, I meant the second quote as putting "tenacious too" after the comma just doesn't...

"So yeah there's no band tonight," Ukyou sighed as she slid back into the booth. "The drummer found out that the bass player was sleeping with his girlfriend, the lead singer." "Isn't tonight's band the Discount Auto Parts?" Sam asked. "Yeah." "Well the ...

I posted a review on ff.net, but I HATE the review format there, so I'm going to review it here. "Maybe... we should... private?" Usagi's stumbling sequence of words appeared to end in a question. "Uh, let's try the store," Ranma said. I'm surprised Ranma didn't make a joke here....

You have a good idea... to the point where yous start doing the bankais and stuff. I'd actually suggest letting Ranma stay male as a soul, but female when in his/her body. It would give Ranma incentive to stay out of his body, and make a rather interesting by-plot of whether it's worth it or not. Wh...

Ok, here's a part of the chapter 1 that I've started on. Should I just go all the way to the point of Fate and Nanoha's 6-month seperation, or should I leave that for the beginning of chapter 2? ---------------------------------------------- It was with the knowledge that her battle with Fate Testar...

How about introducing an actual rival into Ranma's life? Someone who's close to his skill levels, and that they actually meet a lot and has a reason to become stronger than each other? It could be Ryoga, but even with the same emotions, they'd still have to meet often to fight each other. Maybe a st...

Yup. Raging Heart is an Intellegent Device, which, as the name implies, has the capability to speak (somewhat).
And thanks for reminding me that italics did not carry over from Word. *goes fix that*

A surprise fanfic, celebrating something that I will mention in the author's note below. Enjoy, but don't expect anything quick since anyone who knows my writing habit knows that I only write when I feel like it. The air above the shoreline of Uminari City was a beautiful blue, with distant clouds f...

8) Righto, but Sunny wants to see those parts! Maybe I should edit a poll and ask how many wants to see the surgery... I'm not really sure if it matters if I changed the "It" in Naruto's scream as it sounds... uh... how can I put this in words that isn't idiotic... Uh... "Right"?...

Ah, well, I didn't know the technical term of the entire region, so I used the word "it" as a term for the entire package. And no, the replacement is only for Naruto, since he can seemingly regenerate everything, even after losing a lung. I figured that even if he lost... well, "it&qu...

Right.
Sometimes, I wonder if you're really male or not...
Oh well. Off to write the scene about the cutting...

That was frightening. But as said before, it explains a few things. Scary stuff, and written pretty well too. Ending got a bit too spammy, and started to be more of a tell instead of show. Actually, that was the point. Would you want me to write more about the scene before the scream to 'show' inst...

Good point.
*goes and adds a warning*