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Re: The Dark Lords Strike Back, Chapter 4/3b [R/SM cross]

"I died from using the Ginzuisho too heavily, but my fate is still tied to it." Yes, yes, we remember, "Ash nazg durbatulûk, ash nazg gimbatul, Ash nazg thrakatulûk agh burzum-ishi krimpatul." Translated from High Moon, "One crystal to rule them all, one crystal to find them...
by Nadrek
Fri Nov 11, 2011 11:05 pm
 
Forum: Stories and C&C
Topic: The Dark Lords Strike Back, Chapter 4/3b [R/SM cross]
Replies: 26
Views: 14682

Re: The Dark Lords Strike Back, Chapter 3/3a [R/SM cross]

At that, Ryouga let out a tiny snort. "That's so like you, Ranma..." he said, looking over at his rival with a lopsided smile. "Always thinking about martial arts like it's only about speed..." My first thought as soon as I read this was 'The Baksai Tenketsu was originally a min...
by Nadrek
Fri Nov 11, 2011 7:01 pm
 
Forum: Stories and C&C
Topic: The Dark Lords Strike Back, Chapter 3/3a [R/SM cross]
Replies: 12
Views: 7144

Re: The Return [R.5 SM]: Interlude 3 "Down Time"

>>[I should probably include some succubae from the other Houses. ::We know of Blacksky's house and Vephar; others were supposed to be closer to Blacksky's practices than Vephar's. Beyond that, we know little other ::than that they're territorial and prefer the succubus home plane. A 'state visit' f...
by Nadrek
Sat Oct 22, 2011 10:49 pm
 
Forum: Stories and C&C
Topic: The Return [R.5 SM]: Interlude 3 "Down Time"
Replies: 42
Views: 32758

Re: The Return [R.5 SM]: Interlude 3 "Down Time"

[Though Yohko may be reluctant to take that much equipment as she would then be dependent on WIC's supply chain. ::Take 5 pistols, a few spare parts, the gunsmith kit, and 10,000 rounds of ammunition; heck, some of us have to order 1,000 round cases because local ::stores don't stock amounts, and th...
by Nadrek
Sat Oct 22, 2011 7:42 pm
 
Forum: Stories and C&C
Topic: The Return [R.5 SM]: Interlude 3 "Down Time"
Replies: 42
Views: 32758

Re: The Return [R.5 SM]: Interlude 3 "Down Time"

[That said, one of the active units does not have superhuman strength. If anything that unit's member(s) has slightly below average human strength (though human strength varies such that that's a bit mooted). [That's the Second I believe. [The other active unit (4th I think) has somewhat higher stre...
by Nadrek
Fri Oct 21, 2011 9:42 pm
 
Forum: Stories and C&C
Topic: The Return [R.5 SM]: Interlude 3 "Down Time"
Replies: 42
Views: 32758

Re: The Return [R.5 SM]: Interlude 3 "Down Time"

I've just re-read The Return, and will simply make my comments here, if that's all right. The Company was reputed to have two other NH units still active (Ch. 23); yet the Brood's equipment appears very strongly to be the first superhuman strength semi-custom/small manufacturing run weaponry the Com...
by Nadrek
Wed Oct 19, 2011 9:31 pm
 
Forum: Stories and C&C
Topic: The Return [R.5 SM]: Interlude 3 "Down Time"
Replies: 42
Views: 32758

Re: The Dark Lords of Nerima, Epilogue [R/SM cross]

It's not that his problem is that he's unable to process the concept that he could lose to someone other than the other Generals or Beryl. Heck, Tuxedo Kamen's appearance causes him to back down and decide to retreat rather than face him when he's fighting Sailor Moon atop the radio station in epis...
by Nadrek
Tue Feb 22, 2011 10:41 pm
 
Forum: Stories and C&C
Topic: The Dark Lords of Nerima, Epilogue [R/SM cross]
Replies: 17
Views: 3711

Re: The Dark Lords of Nerima, Epilogue [R/SM cross]

Go ahead, use third person limited... just show a snippet from the general or a youma's POV of his return to the dark kingdom. I agree with the other posters; he just got most of a youma army destroyed, himself beat up, a very high end youma leader killed... and he's going back to earth with the sam...
by Nadrek
Mon Feb 21, 2011 10:25 pm
 
Forum: Stories and C&C
Topic: The Dark Lords of Nerima, Epilogue [R/SM cross]
Replies: 17
Views: 3711

Re: Untitled Ranma/Naruto crossover fic (New: Ch. 26)

Pale Wolf is right; that setup is important. For one, that's how I judge whether any given fic is likely to characterize the starting characters; in this case, it looks like the Nerima crew is being treated without much thought by the author, which is a very bad sign for my personal enjoyment, as I ...
by Nadrek
Mon Feb 21, 2011 1:18 am
 
Forum: Stories and C&C
Topic: Untitled Ranma/Naruto crossover fic (New: Ch. 23 to 32)
Replies: 150
Views: 56682

Re: Return ch27

Those additions look good; the reference to JTF2 has hints of both not properly balancing professional responsibilities, and of babysitting JTF2 being much more pleasant than babysitting Usagi.

Murdock's call to Ami was always amusing
by Nadrek
Sat Feb 19, 2011 9:37 pm
 
Forum: Stories and C&C
Topic: Return ch27
Replies: 44
Views: 9952

Re: Return ch27

Brief comments on v3a: 'advantage of this meeting to discus... countermeasures.' - discuss, not discus I'm somewhat disappointed we didn't see more of JTF2; they're fun, and has just been introduced to their demonic instructors. At least some mention of those duties in the "you need to relax&qu...
by Nadrek
Sat Feb 19, 2011 4:06 pm
 
Forum: Stories and C&C
Topic: Return ch27
Replies: 44
Views: 9952

Re: Untitled Ranma/Naruto crossover fic (New: Ch. 26)

My apologies; I mean why did none of the Nerima crew ask for a phone, a radio, a globe (!), or a world map? They wouldn't know about the tech base of the Narutoverse at that point in the timeline. Further, the Kage's not recognizing China or Japan is interesting but irrelevant; perhaps his map has t...
by Nadrek
Fri Feb 18, 2011 6:34 pm
 
Forum: Stories and C&C
Topic: Untitled Ranma/Naruto crossover fic (New: Ch. 23 to 32)
Replies: 150
Views: 56682

Re: Untitled Ranma/Naruto crossover fic (New: Ch. 26)

So... why does no-one in a remote country ask for a phone, an HF radio (multi-thousand mile range, and can be quite small and low powered, with naught but a wire antenna), or a globe/world map?
by Nadrek
Thu Feb 17, 2011 11:34 pm
 
Forum: Stories and C&C
Topic: Untitled Ranma/Naruto crossover fic (New: Ch. 23 to 32)
Replies: 150
Views: 56682

Re: Return ch27

Much better; though I'd specifically state "the removal of an adverse stimulus", even if the "reinforcement by" prefix is left off. The most common use of an adverse stimulus is punishment by the application of an adverse stimulus. Note: this usage is technically correct, but peg...
by Nadrek
Wed Feb 09, 2011 10:41 pm
 
Forum: Stories and C&C
Topic: Return ch27
Replies: 44
Views: 9952

Re: Return ch27

Muahahahaha! Now I have to explai n to my wife why I don't want to go to bed yet. I'm going to try short responses, not one massive one; that may work better with my current situation. "negative punishment" - Eve starts off talking about operant conditioning, sounding like she's studied ps...
by Nadrek
Tue Feb 08, 2011 8:28 pm
 
Forum: Stories and C&C
Topic: Return ch27
Replies: 44
Views: 9952
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